321Revenge
by TheSnarkKnight30
Summary: Alejandro struggles to break up the war between Gwen and Courtney, hide that he could still feel his legs, bring Duncan back to his team, and defeat The Malevolent One. To make matters worse, he suffers an injury to the throat. Now he could no longer speak or manipulate anyone.
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Total Drama Series.

I hear a loud thump that wakes me up out of my sleep. The chef kicks down the cabin door and spills gruel on us with a garbage bag. He snickers to himself and walks away. I'm really starting to get sick of his shenanigans.

"MY EYES!" Scott screams. I'm surprised he's even alive after all the blood he lost to the leeches yesterday. He sits up and bonks his head off of the top bunk. My feet get tangled into my sleeping bag and I fall off the edge of the bed landing face first on the floor. Scott rubs his eyes and walks around the room like a zombie. As I unzip my sleeping bag, Scott trips over and knocks the bunk bed down on top of us.

"You're squishing me." I say trying to push him off.

"Duncan!" Scott yells as he rolls on the floor.

"Duncan is a hamster now, remember?" I ask.

"He's in the fancy hotel and all we get is this dump." Scott complains.

"Stop your whining." I say.

"Dude! My eyes burn. Run and get help." Scott says.

"How could I run and get help if I can't use my legs? I've been in a robot for a year." I ask.

"Just walk on your hands like you always do. I was a robot too you know." He mutters.

"I can't because you're on my arm. This is hopeless. We're all going to die." I say smacking my forehead with my free hand.

"We're not going to die, drama queen." Scott says.

"If only Lightning were here. He'd be able to lift this bed with one finger." I sigh. Suddenly a little tv screen appears in front of us.

"I knew you'd regret kicking off Lightnin. Take that Alebingo. Shabam!" Lightning says appearing on the screen.

"I hate that guy!" Scott says.

"I know. He's so annoying with his constant referring to himself in third person." I say.

"And that stupid shabam catchphrase. I can't believe he won the million last year." He says.

"You're joking… HE won the million dollars? He can't even zip his own pants let alone win a million dollars." I say.

"Maybe we could form an alliance if we get out of here alive. We could be like robot buddies." He says. The getting to Gwen to get to Duncan plan hasn't been working out because of the whole team swap thing. I guess I could settle for the next best thing.

"I like that idea." I say.

"What is taking you two so long? The next challenge is in five minutes." Chris says coming inside the cabin.

"HELP!" Scott screams.

"New beds aren't part of my budget." Chris says completely ignoring us.

"Get us out of here." I say.

Chris and Chef push the bed off of us. I quickly unzip the rest of the sleeping bag. Scott lifts my feet into the air.

"Are you okay, Robot Buddy?" He asks. My hair covers my face as I walk on my hands.

"Don't call me Robot Buddy." I say.

"Ugh. Get a room." Chris says walking through the broken door.

"Who should we kick off if we lose? How about Heather?" He asks.

"No! She's our leader. If we vote her off, then Courtney will take over." I say.

"What's so bad about Courtney?" He asks.

"She's really bossy. Bossier than Jo and Heather combined. We're better off if we vote off Courtney or Gwen because they hate each other." I say.

"I thought you liked Gwen." Scott says.

"No. I'm just trying to get on everyone's good side so they won't vote me off for not being able to walk with my legs. Now that the alliance between Gwen and Duncan is over it doesn't matter." I say.

"We better hurry up and meet with up with the other campers. Let's go." He says.

We meet up with Heather, Courtney, and Gwen. They are standing beside the biggest stack of pancakes I've ever seen in my life. Courtney glares daggers at Gwen. Gwen stares at the ground.

"Where were you guys?" Heather says impatiently.

"Trapped in the cabin waiting to be rescued." I reply.

"Oh my god! Look at those pancakes. I want to eat them." Scott says licking his lips.

"Good. That's the first part of the challenge." Chris says.

"Eating pancakes?" I moan.

"What's the matter? You don't like pancakes. You're such a picky eater." Heather says.

"I like pancakes, but only without syrup. I don't like sticky soggy pancakes." I say.

"Who doesn't eat syrup on their pancakes?" Courtney snaps.

"On your marks… Get set… GO!" Chris shouts waving a crimson flag in the air.

I sink my teeth into the pancakes and chew as quickly as humanly possible. I try to swallow but the hunk of pancake gets lodged in my throat. That's what I get for eating upside down I guess. I cough and gag uncontrollably.

"Be careful, Alejandro. Remember when Bridget ate those chips and did a hand stand and threw up all over the stage in season one?" Sierra asks. "I saw it on tv." I don't answer. I just shove more pancake into my mouth. I'm kind of glad Bridget kissed that pole instead of me. Although I have lost my appetite for the day and I hardly put a dent in the pancakes.

"Alejandro, Courtney is glaring at me again. "Gwen whines with her mouth full. She's such a little tattle tale. I didn't mind as much when she complained to Duncan about it but now it's just irritating. She never fights her own battles. She just hides behind Duncan all the time. Why can't she just tell her off?

"Just ignore her and keep eating. She'll probably stop." I say. Scott wipes syrup off his face with his wrist. A few moments later Gwen starts yapping again.

"That's it! I can't take this anymore. Courtney, I'm sorry. Now would you quit glaring at me?" She says.

"I don't forgive boyfriend kissers." She says sticking her nose in the air like a snob. Courtney was such a pain last year. She would constantly act like a show off every time we had to sing. Everything always had to be her way.

"I tried to be nice, but I've had it with this. Duncan wasn't your boyfriend when I kissed him." She says.

"This happened like a year ago. Get over it." I say.

"Yeah. Shut up and eat the pancakes." Heather says.

"Duncan was mine and you know it." Courtney says.

"Duncan loves me more." Gwen says. I roll my eyes. The Heroic Hamsters are already done eating half their pancakes and we haven't even finished one yet.

"Weren't you the one who was always talking about teamwork?" I ask.

"Guys, stop fighting! We got to work together as a team." Scott says mockingly.

"You're not helping." Heather says.

"I'm the better girlfriend. You'll break his heart like you did to Trent." Courtney says.

"Who the heck is Trent?" I ask.

"Beats me." Scott replies.

"Trent was one of the first competitors. What should we do? If they keep fighting we'll never win." Heather says with her face stuffed with pancakes. She's right. Scott looks like he's about to die of sugar shock at any second. If I eat even one more bite I think my stomach will burst. I'm surprised none of our clothes have split apart at the seams yet. I hope nothing happens to my figure from doing these silly challenges. I feel bad arming my body because my body has never done anything wrong to me. Then again, I am a cartoon so any bodily damage I do is probably temporary.

"You probably were only dating him for his million dollars." Gwen says.

"Take that back." Courtney says throwing a hand full of pancake at Gwen. The Heroic Hamsters have already ate three quarters of the pancakes. Gwen throws some pancake at Courtney's hair.

"Which one do you think we should vote off?" Scott says.

"I wish we could vote both of them off." Heather says.

I walk in between Gwen and Courtney. "Ladies, stop. Don't you remember the good times we had when everyone loved each other and we traveled around the world and everyone would sing in every episode?" I say.

"I don't remember that." Scott says scarfing down the pancakes.

"What ever happened to that?" I ask.

"Sierra blew up the plane." Heather replies.

"Right! Then all her hair burned out. She looked so ugly without her hair." I say. For some reason that seemed to really set Heather off. She whips a giant piece of pancake at me.

"What did I do?" I ask. She doesn't answer. She just stands there and scowls at me. My hair is coated with maple syrup. The smell of it makes me nauseous. I take a bite out of the pancake again. I gag. My body keeps rejecting it. I can't swallow no matter how hard I try. I vomit in the grass. The taste of sugary puke lingers on my tongue. I wonder if Lindsey had the right idea with voting herself off.

"Ew. There's fur on my tongue." Heather says scratching at her tongue.

"From what?" I ask. A raccoon leaps out of the pancakes and digs his claws into my shoulder.

"Did I forget to mention I left little surprises in the pancakes?" Chris asks with a big grin on his face. The raccoon bites on my ear. I grab it by the tail and throw it over to the Heroic Hamster's side.

"What was that?" Scott asks.

"That raccoon poked his fang through my ear lobe." I reply.

"F-f-fang?" Scott stutters baking away from the pancakes.

"Is there something wrong? Is this about that shark again? I assure you that there are no sharks in these pancakes." I say. I think that might be the most random thing I've ever said. Well apparently I was wrong because a giant mutant shark burst through the pancakes.

"FANG!" Scott screams as he runs for his life. Fang chases him away. Now only two of us are eating. We're no match for the six Heroic Hamsters. I come up with a plan. I write Cody's name on the pancake with my finger.

"Hey Sierra. Cody made these for you." I say.

"CODY!" Sierra shrieks diving onto our pancakes and eating them all in one bite.

"Sierra, no!" Camron shouts. We're all getting disqualified. I'm going to get the flush of shame. I don't even care. I just don't want to be near these pancakes for another second. A million dollars would be nice but I was really here to travel around the world again. Instead I'm stuck on this stupid island.

"Vultures win!" Chris says.

"This is bogus. They cheated." Duncan says.

"Their pancakes were eaten before yours." Chris says.

"It's okay. We'll win the other part of the challenge." Camren says.

"How do you know that for sure?" Sam asks.

"Have some confidence. We won twice in a row." Mike says.

"As long as we have each other we'll be okay." Zoey says. Sierra sits up and smiles.

"Nice going, Sierra." Duncan says sarcastically.

"Don't be so hard on her. She didn't mean to make us lose. Winning isn't everything." Zoey says.

"The Vultures get springy shoes to help them in the obstacle course. The first team to make it through the obstacle course wins. " Chris says. Seriously? Springy shoes? That doesn't help me at all.

I high five Scott. I try to do the same to Heather but she high fived my face instead. What's the matter with her? I won the first half of the challenge for our team, didn't I?

The first obstacle is a giant swinging boot. My plan is to army crawl under it once I get close enough to it. It would take too long to crawl the whole way. I hear Sam and Camren panting behind me. Suddenly Sam decided to sack me by the legs for like no reason at all. I guess he thought I needed to be touched by a sweaty fat guy. The boot kicks us but we don't fall into the mud below us. I go past him and on to the spinning logs. At about half way through the logs I threw up again. I wonder why people watch this show for enjoyment. There are a lot of sadistic people in the world.

The final obstacle is up ahead. Three red spheres move up and down. I'm assuming he expects us to jump across. I land on the first one perfectly. Duncan rams into the back of me. "Eat this, Alebozo." He cackles. My arms hold onto the second orb and my feet remain on the first. Then people run across me like a bridge. I hear my back crack. My legs fall and I feel my fingers slipping. Mike turns around and looks at me.

"Need some help?" He asks. Why is he helping me? He probably doesn't think I'm a threat. He grabs my wrists and lifts me up.

"Thanks." I say letting out a small sigh of relief. He takes an obnoxiously big gasp of air.

"Now you die." He says in a deep voice. His hair suddenly goes down over his eyes that stare smugly at me. I could see the darkness of his soul through the gap of his wicked grin. He tightly squeezes my arms and throws me into the mud. Before I could recover, he dives onto me and pushes me under. I cringe. He pounds violently at my chest. I push him off and try to come up for breath.

"Heather!" I scream as I tremble with fear. She turns around looking slightly concerned. She turns away and crosses the finish line. I can't believe Heather would leave me to die. I thought she cared. Mike pounces on me again. I punch him on the cheek. That just makes his menacing laughter grow louder. Mike pushes my head under the mud again. I feel him stomp on my queasy stomach. No matter how much I struggle, he won't stop trying to drown me. My heart beats wildly in my chest. I'm feeling lightheaded from lack of oxygen. I hear a loud splash in the mud. Mike lets me go. I wipe the mud away from my face. Mike takes a deep breath again. Gwen is laying in the mud beside us.

"Courtney! You can't do that. I'm on your team." Gwen yells.

"What happened?" Mike asks as if nothing happened.

"Take my springy shoes. Don't hurt me. Leave me alone." I whimper.

"Relax. I don't want to hurt you." Mike says. I spit out a mouthful of mud.

"You tried to kill me." I shout. He stares at me with a puzzled expression.

"No I didn't." He says trying to help me up. I try to make a break for it, but I can't get up the ladder to get back to the obstacle course. Pretending to be unable to use my legs has to be one of the riskiest plans I've ever came up with. If I used my legs to fight Mike, I might have been able to hold my own. I'm considering coming clean and telling them I could walk just fine. They'll probably kick me off if I do. Maybe I'll just tell them my legs are feeling a little better next time I get a massage.

Sam falls into the mud after trying to jump across the red orbs. I use his stomach as a trampoline to get back on the red spheres. This time I make it across the finish line without much of a struggle. Mike beats Gwen to the finish line, but she still made it before Sam and Camren.

"Vultures win!" Chris says. Scott is the only one on our team that seems happy.

We meet at the campfire for another elimination ceremony.

"Who should go to Boney Island?" Scott asks.

"Maybe we could send Courtney there so that the animals could devour her." I say.

"What if she finds that immunity statue? Maybe I should go instead." He suggests. That means I'll get a room to myself because I'm the only boy. In most circumstances I would enjoy being alone, but now I'm afraid that Mike will try to kill me in my sleep.

"I don't think you should-" I say.

"I'll be fine." He says grabbing his bags.

"Be careful, my friend. The island is surrounded with water infested with sharks." I say trying to trick him into staying.

"Cameron and Sam survived. I could handle it." He says hesitating for a moment.

I highly doubt he will get eliminated tonight. Sierra probably go home for eating our pancakes.

Heather is still giving me the silent treatment. I've never been given the silent treatment before. A girl has never tried to resist me. I feel like I'm the size of an ant. I guess I finally know how Duncan feels. Courtney sneaks dirty looks to Gwen the entire time.

"The following people are safe; Zoey, Camren, Mike, Duncan." Chris pauses. "This is the final marshmallow of the night. It goes to Sierra." Chris says throwing Sierra the final marshmallows. Sam's jaw drops. Who would have though he would be the one to take The Flush of Shame tonight? I heard it was because they thought he should go home and play video games. I guess I don't blame them for getting rid of him. He certainly isn't athletic or intelligent enough to be on this show.

Courtney, Gwen, Heather, and I go inside the hotel. I walk up to Heather.

"If it makes you feel any better, you could have the massages tonight." I say.

"Fine." She says bitterly.

"Can you tell me what I did wrong?" I ask.

"You're a big boy. Figure it out for yourself." She says.

"Can you at least give me a little hint?" I ask.

"Ugh. You're so dense. Sierra. That's your hint." She says.

"Are you mad about me using her to cheat in the challenge?" I ask.

"No. Since when do I care if you manipulate people?" She says.

"I didn't flirt with Sierra." I say.

"I know." She says.

"I don't know. I'm really sorry for whatever I did." I say.

"You better be." She says slamming her bedroom door in my face. I think I lost my ability to seduce women. Maybe it's from being in a robot for a year. Or perhaps it's because I'm covered in mud and syrup. I go to the bathroom to get washed up. Gwen is waiting for me outside.

"Is Heather still blanking you?" She asks.

"Yes." I grumble.

"I know why she's upset. I'll tell you why if you help me vote Courtney off next time we lose." Gwen says.

"Alright. I'll try to vote off Courtney." I say.

"You made fun of Sierra for being bald." Gwen says.

"So what? She makes fun of people all the time." I say.

"Heather was bald." Gwen says. It's official. Everything I know is a lie.

"What?" I blurt out.

"She got her head shaved in a truth or dare challenge on the first season. She's still really sensitive about it." Gwen says.

"THAT is what this is about? How was I supposed to know she was bald?" I ask.

"I don't know. You should leave her alone for a while. She'll get over it eventually." Gwen says. Eventually? How long is eventually. If Heather hasn't gotten over her baldness from three years ago, Courtney will never get over Gwen kissing Duncan. Which is why Courtney has to go. I wish I knew how long a girl could hold a grudge. I wonder if Bridget and Lashawna are still mad at me.

Heather sits on her bed silently. "I know why you're upset." I say. "It's because I made a comment about Sierra's hair falling out. It was uncalled for of me to say such a thing. I was unaware of your situation. It was wrong of me to make fun of people who are bal…You know." I say.

"It's okay." Heather says.

"Don't stop me. I'm on a roll. Some of my hair burned out when was burned by the volcano. I'm sure I didn't suffer as much humiliation as you did because I was in a robot the entire time, but I should have known better than to say something so insensitive. If you are able to forgive me out of the goodness of your heart it would be greatly appreciated." I say.

"I already said it was okay. There was no need for your boring long winded apology." Heather says.

"I just poured my heart out to you and that's what I get in return?" I say.

"What did you expect me to do, leap into your arms and start crying?" Heather asks.

"I guess. I hate admitting when I'm wrong. That took a lot of courage." I reply.

"I was only pretending to be mad at you because I like to see you squirm." She says.

"You were going to let Mike kill me." I say.

"You were fine, you big baby." She says. Never in my life have I suffered this much abuse in one day. Maybe I should try to flatter her. That usually works.

"Well I'm sure you were beautiful even without your hair." I say.

"Don't lie to me, you idiot." Heather snaps.

"Fine. I bet you looked like a naked mole rat when you were bald." I hiss. She turn around and slaps me across the face. "OW! What do you want me to say?" I ask.

"I want you to get out of here. You keep making things worse." She says.

"Goodnight, Heather." I say as I close the door. I'm going to have sleep without my sleeping bag due to the incident that occurred this morning. I hope Scott is okay at Boney Island. I check under my bed for Mike before going to sleep.

Oh god. Somebody is touching my feet again. I feel my boots and socks slide off one by one. I pretend to be asleep. I hear someone giggling. I sit up.

"Heather, what are you doing to my feet?" I ask looking down at my half painted toes.

"Gwen and Courtney were fighting so I couldn't sleep." She replies.

"So you decided to paint my toenails cotton candy pink?" I ask.

"Yeah. Duh." She says putting away her nail polish.

"You might as well do the other foot to make it even." I say.

"I can't believe you still can't feel your legs yet." Heather says,

"Actually when Mike attacked me I started feeling pins in needles in my legs." I say.

"Maybe you should try to walk on your legs again." She says. I slowly put both my feet on the ground. I stand up, wobble my legs, and drop to the floor. "Here. Let me help you." She says standing me back up again. I cling onto the wall for balance.

"You're going to let me fall." I say slowly staggering forward.

"I am not." She says holding my hands.

"They're tingling badly. Maybe I should stop." I say collapsing to the floor.

"You're getting the hang of it. If only you weren't so stiff." She says. I keep moving a few steps then fall on her.

"I'm sorry." I say backing away slowly.

"What? No big novel about why you're sorry?" She asks.

"Not this time. I haven't had time to rehearse one." I say. She pulls me back up off the floor.

"Go lay down. I think I could give you some treatments." She says. I struggle my way back on the bed. That worked out quite nicely. Even though I don't like the way she said the word treatments. She comes back with a big basket. She takes out a seagull feather and tickles the bottom of my feet. I hold in laughter the best I could. I cover my mouth and hide it in a cough.

"Can you feel this?" She asks.

"No." I lie. "What are you doing?" I ask.

"Trying to see if your nerves in your legs could sense tickling. I guess it's not doing any good." She says.

She begins to roll up my pant legs and pour some liquid on my legs. She gently rubs it.

"Can you feel this?" She asks.

"No." I lie. "What is it."

"Some kind of skin oil." She says. I'm sure Heather has never been to medical school but whatever she's doing feels kind of nice. I see her pick up a tiny silver thing. "What is that?" I ask.

"Duncan's lighter." She replies casually.

"A lighter." I mumble peacefully to myself. "A LIGHTER?!" I shout. Before I have time to stop her my legs burst into flames. I quickly smother the flames with a blanket. "That could have burned my skin off and got infected." I yell.

"Did it hurt?" She asks.

"No." I lie.

"Good. Let's continue." She says.

"I'm getting tired. Maybe we could do this later." I say.

"You want to do well in the challenge tomorrow, don't you?" She asks.

"I suppose." I say. No matter what that vixen does I will not fall into temptation and move my legs.

"Let's try some acupuncture." She says taking a hammer and nails out of the basket. I swallow a lump in my throat. She burns the nail with the lighter and hammers them into my flesh. I bite my bottom lip to stop myself from screaming.

"Can you feel that?" She asks.

"No." I whimper.

"How about some physical therapy. We'll start off with bowling." She says dropping Jo's bowling ball on my foot. "How does that feel?" She asks. I wince.

"I can't feel it at all. In fact if I start to pee in my pants let me know because I won't be able to feel it drizzling down my legs." I say.

"Oh, speaking of pee, here's a jellyfish." She says dropping a live jellyfish on my lap.

She begins to sprinkle little green leaves on my legs. "Is that poison ivy?" I ask.

"Yes. Why? Does it itch?"She asks. I breathe in and out heavily. I shake my head no.

"Now you're going to wax my legs?" I ask dryly.

"Yeah. You waxed your face. What's the difference?" She asks innocently.

"Men don't wax their legs." I growl.

"Men don't paint their nails either." She says ripping off the waxing strip. I almost let out a yelp. My eye twitches. I feel myself trembling with rage.

"This is ridiculous." I say standing on my hands.

"You're ridiculous. Now sit down." She says.

"Yes mam." I mumble.

"This won't hurt a bit." She says pouring salt all over my cuts. I feel my eyes tearing up. What is she going to do, eat me?

"Salt. Who knew? I think I feel better now. Thank you so much." I say hoping that would make her stop.

"I still need to run a few more tests." She says. I roll my eyes and moan quietly. She snickers at me.

"It won't be funny when you're paying my hospital bills." I hiss.

"I'll use the million dollars you didn't win last year." Heather says.

"That was cold." I say.

"No, this is." She says pouring a bag of ice on my legs. That makes the stinging sensation even worse. I hate being cold.

"I'm fine. I don't need your treatments. You're not a doctor." I sniffle.

"If you're fine you should be able to cross a bridge of legos with no problem." Heather says. I smirk.

"A bridge of legos? You mean like the children's toys?" I ask.

"Yes. Get crossing." She says pointing at the bridge. Legos aren't dangerous. This should be a piece of cake. I take my first step on the lego bridge and fall to my knees. Not on purpose. Those things are little colorful boxes of pain. Not to mention that she broke half my toes with a bowling ball.

"I'd like to see you cross a bridge of legos." I say bitterly.

"I'm sorry. There's nothing more I could do to help you. I guess that means I'm going to amputate your legs." She says taking an axe out of the basket.

"PLEASE DON'T CUT OFF MY LEGS!" I beg. I am reduced to a sobbing mess. It's not a cute kind of cry either. My eyes get all red and puffy and fountains of snot pour out of my nose. It's like when my mother watches The Notebook minus the mascara.

"Alejandro, I was joking. I wasn't going to cut off your legs. Can't you take a joke? " She says laughing. "Oh my god. Are you crying?" She asks. I nod. "Come over here." She says opening her arms.

"I don't trust you. Put the axe down first." I say feeling my voice crack.

"There. Happy?" She says putting the axe off the floor. I nod again and let her embrace me. I bury my face into her shoulder. I feel her gently rubbing my back. "What's the matter?" She asks.

"You said you were going to cut my legs off." I say losing control of the squeak in my voice.

"I can't understand a word you're saying." She says. "I knew your legs were fine the whole time. I hope you learned your lesson. I wanted to see how long it would take you to run out of the room." She says.

"You're so mean." I say half laughing half blubbering. I probably deserved some of this. "This isn't funny."

"You're such a sissy." She says smiling from ear to ear.

"Thanks." I say sarcastically as I rub my eye.

"Anything for a friend." She says.

"I'm not your friend." I grumble as I scratch my leg.

"You don't like me?" She asks.

"Not one bit." I say. She buries her face into the palms of her hands and sniffles. Nothing makes me more miserable than watching a girl cry. Stupid gentleman code. I wrap my arm around her.

"Heather?" I say trying to see if she is faking it. Her crying becomes louder. "Stop! I'm sorry… I could be your friend… Just… Please, Don't cry anymore…" I babble. Heather uncovers her face. She was laughing the whole time. I'm never going to hear the end of this one. I swear quietly under my breath in Spanish. I wish I could hit her like Lashawna did, but alas I wasn't brought up that way. Chivalry is my only downfall in life.

"Sucker!" She says poking me in the stomach. I'm still sensitive there from the pancakes and Mike stepping on me. My whole body spasms. "That got you to move your legs." She says.

"It did?" I say glancing down at the pile of ice cubes on my legs. "I guess I really can't feel my legs now." I say.

"Serves you right." She says playfully smacking my face. I put my hands over my nose and close my eyes tightly. I rub the blood from my leg underneath my nose.

"Ow! Darn it, Heather that really hurt." I say.

"It did not. I didn't even hit you that hard." Heather argues.

"I think you broke my nose." I say.

"Bull crap." She says pulling my hand away from my face. I grab an ice cube off my leg and put it on my nose. "Oh my god. You're bleeding." She says.

"No I'm not." I say with a smirk.

"You jerk!" She say.

"Can't you take a joke?" I say mockingly. She punches me in the stomach.

"I hate you." She says.

"I hate you too." I say letting my hands ball into fists. We glare at each other for like ten seconds and then Heather randomly kisses me and that escalated to making out. Much to my dismay, she tastes like pancakes. Then again, everything tastes like pancakes to me now. "I got to go. " Heather says in a panic stricken tone. Looking just as shocked as I am, Heather leaves the room. What the heck just happened? Apparently I left the ice on my legs for too long because now I have frost bite. I'm not entirely sure if I should stay in here alone or not. Heather might come back and cut off my legs when I'm asleep. Or worse. Mike could smother me with a pillow. I got to get out of here. I run out of the hotel on my hands without even putting on my boots. Heather probably stuffed them with broken glass. One second she acts like she's totally into me and the next she's trying to murder me. Maybe the Heroic Hamsters will let me stay in their cabins for the night.

I knock on the boy's cabin door with my head. Duncan opens it. He pats his fist into his palm. I forgot he's trying to play for the cameras so that he could get back on the Villainous Vultures. He's acting twice as much a jerk so he could be on the same team as Gwen and Courtney. To make matters worse it's like three o clock in the morning. Duncan likes his sleep. I remember one time Lightning coughed in the middle of the night and he gave him a knuckle sandwich. He picks me up by the shirt collar, punches me in the eye, and pulls out his pocket knife. I flinch. I feel cold sweat run down my shoulders. Since when have I become everyone's chew toy?

"Listen, pretty boy. You stay away from Gwen or I'll really give you something to cry about. Ya hear?" He says. I wonder how many times I'm going to get mauled today.

"I'm not interested in Gwen. I only wanted to get on Gwen's good side so I could form an alliance with you. I can't do that now that we are on different teams. Now I'm in an alliance with Scott and Heather." I say. At least I think Heather would want to be a part of it.

"If you pull any other tricks like today, my foot is going to go up your butt so far it will come out the other end." Duncan says.

"Actually, that would be breaking the laws of physics." Camren says.

"Shut up, dweeb. Nobody cares about you and your stupid geography." Duncan says.

"If you want to be on their team so badly, why don't you make someone on our team do something heroic?" I ask.

"That's not such a bad idea. Why don't you be heroic and I'll act really mean?" He says. Maybe because if I'm a hamster Scott and Heather won't be on my team and I'll be stuck with Mike and Sierra.

"Maybe I could convince Courtney to try to redeem herself since we were planning to vote her off anyway." I reply.

"What are you even doing here?" He asks.

"I was hoping you would let me stay here for the night." I say.

"I know you're up to something. Who in the right minds would want to be in a cabin and not the fancy hotel. You better get your prissy little butt out of here before I punch your face in." Duncan says.

"I don't want to be in a hotel with three crazy ladies." I say.

"Boohoo. What's so bad about that?" Duncan says.

"Look at my feet." I say. He lets go of my ankles and drops me head first on the floor. "You're looking at a poison ivy rash, a third degree burn, and frostbite." I say.

"Dude. You're wearing toenail polish." Duncan chuckles.

"I know." I say scowling at him.

"Hey, guys! Come look at this." He says. Camren and Mike stand beside me. I forgot Mike lives here. They all laugh in unison. I miss back when people used to take me seriously.

"Maybe we should let him stay." Mike says.

"He seems pretty harmless." Camren says.

"I can't trust him as far as I could throw him. He probably is using his little leg problem as a pity party." Duncan says.

"You're no saint either." I say.

"At least I don't sweet talk my way to victory." Duncan says.

"Think about it, Duncan. What girl wants a guy who can't even walk if they could have a strong man like you to protect them? I look like a fool when I flirt upside down. The majority of the girls here have boyfriends who are more than capable of beating me to a pulp. I was utterly useless in the leech ball challenge because I couldn't walk on my hands and fire a gun at the same time. You and I both know that I will be eliminated sooner or later. You clearly have the advantage this time around. The least you could do is let me stay the night." I say.

"Duncan, it's starting to rain. Let him in." Camren says.

"Don't tell me what to do." He says. "Now beat it!" Duncan gives me a hard kick to the rump and slams the door. The rain pours on my face.

I go to the next cabin and knock on the door. I feel the blood rush to my head from being upside down. I lay on the ground until Zoey answers it this time. "May I help you?" She asks.

"I'm exhausted. Please let me in." I say.

"Sure. No problem." She says with a warm smile on her face.

"You do know it was my fault you guys lost the challenge today, right?" I ask.

"Yeah. That doesn't mean I should leave you outside with a black eye in the pouring rain." She says.

"You're not mad?" I ask.

"We'll do better next time. Besides, I shot you in the butt with a leech." She says.

"If it's not too much to ask, do you happen to have any nail polish remover I can borrow?" I ask.

"Sorry. I don't have any. Maybe Sierra does." Zoey says. "Hey Sierra, do you have any nail polish remover?" Zoey asks.

"No." Sierra says with a pout on her face. "What is he doing here? I bet he's trying to get me voted off again."

"He's having a rough night. I thought we should let him stay here." Zoey says.

"Well someone broke my cellphone while I was asleep. Now I can't talk to Cody." She whines.

"What a shame." I say sarcastically.

"I know right. I'm so lonely." She says blowing her nose in a tissue and handing it to me. I immediately drop it on the ground and rub my hands on my pants.

"We could keep you company." Zoey says. Great, now she's dragging me into this. I just want to go to sleep.

"Good idea. I still need some interview questions for my fan page when I go home." Sierra says.

"Alright. Just make it brief." I say.

"First question. How did you go to the bathroom when you were in the robot?" Sierra asks. Zoey bursts out laughing. My face turns red.

"Well…I…uh…You see… Don't you have any less embarrassing questions?" I ask staring at the ground.

"Ew." Zoey says to herself.

"Are you a Gwuncan or a Duncney shipper?" Sierra asks. I wish she'd ask me questions in English.

"Am I a what? I can't drive a boat." I say. They start laughing at me again.

"She means do you think Duncan should date Courtney or Gwen." She says.

"I honestly don't care who he dates. If I remember, correctly he drug them both down a pyramid when we were in Egypt. That is no way to handle a lady." I say.

"What if you had to pick one?" Sierra asks.

"Well Courtney is very demanding and Duncan hates being told what to do. I don't think they'd be able to have a stable relationship. Duncan and Gwen seem to have too much in common. Maybe Gwen should get back with Trent; whoever he is." I say.

"Do you like Coderra shipping?" Sierra asks.

"No. I hate shipping." I say. What the heck is a Coderra? Sierra throws her pillow at me and sobs uncontrollably.

"That was not cool." Zoey says scolding me.

"What?" I ask. Wait a minute… Coderra…Cody…Seirra… Oh no! What have I done?

"But we're soulmates." Cierra cries.

"Wait! I didn't mean that. That just came out wrong. I think you make a nice stalker. I MEAN COUPLE!" I say.

"It's okay Sierra. Let it all out." Zoey says patting her on the back. Sierra opens her mouth and lets out a deafening scream.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know what Coderra meant." I say.

"Leave me alone." She blubbers.

"Now we'll never get to sleep." Zoey says.

"There's got to be a way to get her to stop crying." I say. Now I remember the hypnosis trick my uncle taught me. I wasn't able to use it in a while because I was trapped alone in that robot. I hope I can still do it. It will help me win a few challenges and maybe get Duncan, Mike, and Heather off my back. "Three…Two…One…Slumber." I say snapping my fingers. Sierra plops on the mattress and starts to snore.

"You could brainwash people?" Zoey says.

"Sort of." I reply.

"Maybe you could help Mike with his problem." Zoey says. She knows about Mike? That's great. Now all I have to do is find out how to keep him away from me.

"What's wrong with Mike?" I ask.

"He was born with a multiple personality disorder." Zoey says. I wonder if how many personalities he has and how many of them are dangerous.

"I'm not sure if I'm able to use hypnosis on someone like him." I say.

"Why don't you try to teach me how to hypnotize people?" She asks. That doesn't sound like such a good idea. If she could hypnotize people, she would be invincible. Jo, Lightning, and Scott always called her a damsel in distress, but it seems to me that she is the power house of her team. Zoey caused them to win two challenges in a row. She defeated Jo with a sling shot when Jo was using a gun. Zoey might even be too perfect. I don't think she's even human. She creeps me out when she acts all nice to me. Now that I think about it, I kind of like it when Heather abuses me.

"Sorry. I really don't know how to explain it."I lie.

"That's okay." She says.

"I appreciate you letting me stay here for the night. You saved me a lot of trouble." I say.

"Mike used to save me all the time. Now I'm a bit more independent." She says. Before I could say another word Sierra squeezes me tightly in her sleep.

"Cody. I miss you so much." She mumbles. I push her away. I thought that Camren was the only person she mistakes for Cody. I don't even look like Cody. At least I hope I don't.

"Seirra, you're invading my personal space." I say. She climbs up on my aching lap.

"Gee Cody. Your nose got longer. Have you been telling lies?" She asks as she pinches my nose.

"Zoey… Zoey! Make her stop." I say.

"I can't. Her grip is like an anaconda. Maybe Mike can help." Zoey says.

"I don't think you should wake up Duncan agai-" I say being cut off by Sierra kissing me. Has everyone on this island completely lost their minds? I think each and every person on this island is going to crack one by one. I'll be the next person to go insane.

"You really need a haircut. You're growing facial hair? You must be getting old. You smell like waffles. You know you're not supposed to have junk food. You better not be letting yourself go while I'm gone." She rambles as she climbs on me like a tree. I feel so self-conscious. It feels like it was just yesterday that my ego was the size of this island. Wait, it was just yesterday. If I don't get Sierra off me I won't live to see tomorrow. She's just one more name on the list of people I'm terrified of.

"Three…Two…One… And you're back." I say. Sierra wakes up out of her trance.

"I think I might have dozed off." She says standing up.

"I'm going to go back before something else bad happens. See you tomorrow." I say standing on my hands and stumbling away. I'm sure Heather is already asleep. If anyone attacks me while I'm asleep I'll just hypnotize them. I go into the boy's bedroom at the hotel and try to get some rest.


	2. Chapter 2

I feel someone tap me on the shoulder. I immediately panic and roll off the bed. Thank god; it's just the butler. I don't think I even want breakfast. I see Gwen and Courtney sitting at opposite ends of the table as always. I sit next to Heather. I should tell her about Sierra. There's cameras all over the place. She's going to find out what happened eventually. If I try to keep it a secret, it might make things worse.

"Good morning Heather." I say trying to start up a conversation.

"Where were you? You had me worried sick last night." She says.

"You were worried about me?" I ask with a giddy little smile on my face.

"No! I just can't believe you would do something so stupid. You can't wander around in your condition. You could have been eaten by a bear or something." She says.

"I wouldn't have ran away if you didn't threaten me with an axe." I say.

"I was kidding!" She says slamming her fist on the table. I back away. "Congratulations! Now you have a black eye." She says.

"Relax. I just got into a little scuffle with Duncan. It'll go away." I say trying not to draw any more attention to myself.

"Duncan?" Gwen says.

"Is he okay?" Courtney asks.

"I didn't hurt him. I just stood there and let him beat the crap out of me." I say.

"How pathetic." Heather says drinking her orange juice.

"I have to tell you something." I say.

"What now?" Heather asks.

"I wanted to tell you that-" I say. BeforeI could finish Scott walks into the kitchen.

"Hey guys. What's up?" He says.

"It's good to have you back." I say.

"I still didn't find the invincibility trophy. It's gotta be somewhere. I was chased by a giant beaver, but I was too smart for it." He says.

"Of course." I say trying not to sound too sarcastic.

"How was the hotel?" He asks.

"Well actually I stayed at the girls cabin The Heroic Hamsters for the night." I say.

"Score!" Scott says obliviously.

"No. Not score." I say.

"You look terrible. No wonder you didn't score any chicks." He says.

"Thanks, Scott." I say sarcastically. "I didn't want any chicks. All I wanted was some lousy nail polish remover and I didn't even get that." Heather smiles devilishly at me.

"I guess that mean you're just going to have to wait for it to chip off on its own." Heather says.

"Well whose fault's that?" I ask making a grumpy face.

"I don't know." Scott says.

"That was a rhetorical question." I say.

"What were you trying to tell me earlier?" Heather asks.

"Oh yeah...That… I was going to tell you that Sie-" I say.

"Attention campers! All campers must get over to the docks immediately." Chris says through a megaphone.

"Oh well. It probably wasn't that important." Heather says.

Chris stands on the docks with a big box of DVDs. Great. How am I supposed to make Courtney look like a hero if all we're going to do is watch movies?

"The good news is, there will be no elimination tonight. The bad news is you'll all will be spending the night on Boney Island. Your challenge is to watch a movie about your biggest fears. Then each of you will be hooked up to a machine. This machine will record how long you sleep. Whatever team has the most hours of sleep is the winner." Chris says.

"The joke's on you, Chris. There's no horror film about green jelly." Courtney says. Courtney is afraid of green jelly? I thought I had issues.

"You will be watching Flubber." Chris says. "Heather will be watching Sumo Wrestling videos. Scott, you will be watching Jaws. Gwen will be watching buried alive. I was going to make Alejandro watch a movie about volcanos, but after seeing his awkward display of terror last night, I decided to make you watch Saw instead." Chris says.

"How is this fair? Saw is like rated R and Flubber is rated G." I say. I'm surprisingly not that afraid of volcanos. I wouldn't like to be around one when it erupts, but I wouldn't freak out if I saw one.

"I saw The Human Centipede. You ain't got nothing on me, Mclain." Duncan brags.

"Duncan, you will be watching all of Celine Dion's music videos. Mike will be watching Hide and Seek. Camren will be watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Sierra, you will be watching a video of my interns torturing Cody. Zoey, you will be watching The Exorcist." Chris says.

"Alejandro, a friend of yours was watching the show and he heard about your bad day. So I let him come visit you and be a member of your team. He will be watching the movie with you." Chris says. I wonder who it is. I hope it's Noah. He was nice. Tyler would be okay too. Oh god no! It can't be.

"Hia, Al." Owen says standing on a ship with two suitcases in his hands. Kill me now. You'd think he would figure out by now that I detest being called Al.

"Hello, Owen." I say dryly.

"This is so exciting. We're going to watch a movie together. It'll be just like old times." Owen says.

"Yippee." I mutter sarcastically.

"I drew you a get well card. It has a robot dancing on a volcano. It says get well Al." He says.

"How thoughtful." I say sarcastically.

"So when are ya gonna tell everybody that your legs aren't really numb?" Owen asks.

"Owen!" I scold.

"Oops. I guess you haven't told anyone yet." He says.

"Be quiet. The movie is starting." I say. I hate being around morbidly obese people. Breathing the same air as them makes me feel like I took in fifty thousand calories.

"Wait a minute. This movie is about saws as in the tool. I thought they meant like I SAW the movie. So everyone would be like "I saw saw today." And the other guy would be like "I saw saw too." Owen says.

"Your lack of intelligence astounds me." I say with my eyes still glued to the screen.

"You better move over, Al. I think I feel a big fart coming on." Owen says. I back away. The room smells of dead fish. "Too late." He says.

"Are you trying to make me feel miserable? If you are, your success is in a high abundance." I say.

"Ew. That guy just stuck his hand right in the toilet." Owen says.

"Yes, Owen. I know. I'm not blind. I know what's going on." I say through clenched teeth.

"That's nasty! It reminds me of the time when Heather licked my armpit." Owen says.

"I beg your pardon." I say turning towards him.

"It reminded me of the time Heather licked my armpit." Owen repeats.

"She licked your armpit?" I ask putting my hand over my lips.

"Yeah. It was a dare." Owen says.

"I don't care what it was. That's disgusting." I say.

"Al…Al… Are you okay? You're getting all fidgety." Owen says.

"That image is never going to leave my memory." I say rubbing my temples.

"She also ate jelly from my belly button, and she ate a live bug, and she kissed chef's dirty sock puppet, and-" Owen rambles.

"I don't want to hear about it!" I shout over his voice. I pause the movie and storm out of the cabin.

"Where ya goin Al?" Owen asks following me like he's my tail. I smack my forehead let out an aggravated sigh.

"I'm going to brush my teeth." I reply.

"Why?" He asks.

"Because I made out with Heather last night." I say.

"You seem angry, Al." Owen says pointing out the obvious.

"Stay away from me." I say attempting to lock myself in the confessional to escape from him.

"Why?" Owen asks.

"Because being in your presence makes my life a living he-" I see Heather walk out of the confessional. "Hello, Heather."I say clutching my stomach and gaging. I picture her licking Owen's armpit.

"What's wrong with you?" She asks. I push her out of the way and vomit in the confessional toilet without thinking. I turn around and stare into the hidden camera.

"I'm sorry." I say to the public.

"He's fine. Al's just having a meltdown. That's all." I hear Owen say from outside. I push open the door.

"Hey, Al. I got you my bottle of Listerine." Owen says. Well at least he did one good thing. I snatch the bottle of Listerine, pour half of it in my mouth, swish it around in my mouth until I can't take the burn, and spit it out in the confessional toilet.

"Is the movie really that scary?" Heather asks.

"I don't know. Owen kept talking through it all." I say.

"Al's just upset because I said part of the movie reminded me of the time you licked my armpit. Now he wants to brush his teeth." Owen says.

"Quit saying that. You're making me nauseous." I say covering my ears.

"Saying what, the thing about Heather li-" Owen says.

"YES! THAT!" I yell.

"It's not that big of a deal." Heather says.

"Yes it is!" I argue.

"You made out with a pineapple!" Heather says.

"I thought we agreed to never speak of that again. I wasn't at the best state of mind when I did that." I say.

"What's the difference?" She asks.

"First of all pineapples are meant to be eaten, second of all it was a yummy pineapple, and furthermore the pineapple didn't lick Owen's armpit." I say. Is it just me, or is this show making less sense every episode?

"Those are the lamest excuses I've ever heard." Heather says.

"I like pineapples!" Owen says.

"Shut up, Owen." I say.

"I licked Owen's armpit three years ago. You're fine!" Heather says.

"I hope this isn't going to ruin your relationship. Should I try to make things better?" Owen asks.

"NO!" Heather and I shout in unison.

"You act like such a child!" Heather says stomping her foot.

"Is there anything else that I should know about?" I ask. That reminds me. I never got to tell Heater about Sierra kissing me. I can't say it with Owen around or he'll just make things worse. I need a way to get rid of him. Of course! Duncan! I could make Owen look like a hero and the he'll switch teams with Duncan. I'd be killing two birds with one stone.

"I don't think so." Owen says.

"Good. We better go finish the rest of that movie." I say.

We get back to the cabin and unpause the movie.

"Oh my god! He's gunna saw off his own foot! That's disgusting! He's screaming really loud! That looks like it really hurts. Look at all that blood. I'm going to have nightmares" Owen says.

"Silence is a virtue." I say.

"I thought that patience is a virtue." Owen says.

"Be quiet." I say.

"I think you mean silence is golden. But does silence even have a color. You confuse me sometimes Al. Look at that ugly mask on that girl. Oh no! She's going to dig the key out of that guy!" Owen says stuffing popcorn into his mouth. I'm still more disturbed about Heather's dares. I'm not usually bothered by what happens in movies because I know it's not real. It doesn't make it any less disgusting though. I think they spent half the movie budget on fake blood.

"How are you eating right now?" I ask.

"Hey look. The guy in the middle of the bathroom is getting up!" Owen says. Owen throws the bowl of popcorn and screams. Popcorn rains down on top of me. Owen leaps on my laps and constricts my neck with his massive arms. "NOOOO! He died! Hey Al, look the movie is over." Owen says.

"Ouch! You better not keep me up all night on Boney Island." I say pushing him on the ground.

"Something tells me you don't like me very much." Owen says.

"What was your first clue?" I ask. Owen shrugs. Owen and I meet the others back at the docks. Scott s sitting as far away from the water as possible. He sits on the ground and  
rocks back and forth. Courtney looks just as traumatized. Gwen seems to be slightly used to being buried alive since it happened to her twice. I can't tell if Heather is afraid or not. If she was she'd never admit it. The Hamsters seem to have scarier movies than our team's (well except for Duncan's). I have no idea how anyone could be afraid of Celine Dion.

"Everyone get on the boat to Boney Island." Chris says.

"I'm not going on any boat. That's how the s-ss-s-sharks get you." Scott says.

"This boat is way too big for a shark to knock over." I say.

"I'm not going!" Scott says clinging to a tree.

"You just went to Boney Island yesterday and you're just fine." Courtney says.

"Come on!" Gwen says pulling on his shoulders.

"I don't wanna!" Scott screams.

"Let go of the tree!" Heather says pulling on Gwen's shoulders. Courtney grabs on to Heather. It still isn't enough to get Scott to let go.

"Help them, Owen! Like a hero would." I say winking at Duncan.

"I'm SuperOwen!" Owen says pulling on Courtney. Owen grunts loudly and sweat drips down his ear. I get down off my hands and lay on my stomach. I grab Owen by the ankles and pull. Scott still doesn't budge. Chris grabs me by the feet and yanks Scott off of the tree. Pain shoots through my knees. My entire team lands on top of me. To make matters worse, Owen decides that it is a wonderful opportunity to fart. Chef has to literally carry Scott onto the boat.

"I think I'm going to be seasick." Scott says.

"Owen, could you be a hero and help take care of Scott while I talk to Heather?" I ask.

"Okie Dokie, Allie!" He says. I hope he doesn't permanently call me Allie. Al was bad enough.

Heather sits at the other end of the ship paying hard to get and winning I might add. "I was trying to tell you this morning that Scott and I formed an alliance and I was wondering if you wanted to be a part of it. I also wanted to tell you that last night Sie-"

"You formed an alliance with Scott and you didn't tell me about it till now? I am your girlfriend. I should be your top priority." Heather says in an angry tone.

"Scott asked me first. I didn't want to be rude and say no to him. He would probably vote me off. That wasn't even the bad part." I mumble.

"I should throw you overboard right now!" She says.

"I don't think I could swim in those high tides." I say staring at the waves below.

"That's the point, Sherlock." She says.

"You're adorable when you're angry." I say trying to change the subject.

"I know." Heather says. Modesty? What's that?

"Maybe I should wait for you to be in a better mood." I say.

"I guess you're not completely stupid after all." Heather says. I think that might be the nicest thing she's said to me all day. I better not ruin it, but then again, I no longer wish to have this guilt bottled up inside me. I used to be able to break peoples' hearts with no remorse. The boat stops in front of Boney Island. I've never been to Boney Island before. It is a little more unpleasant than I anticipated, but I think I could handle spending a night here. I wonder if I'll find Chris's trophy. As each of us get out of the boat Chris attaches a tiny gadget to our backs.

We set up camp far away from the ocean to attempt to get Scott to go to sleep. The Heroic Hamsters are almost out of sight. It didn't take me very long to go to sleep because I hardly got any sleep last night and my sugar rush from the pancakes wore off. I hear someone shriek from behind me. My eyes widen and my heart leaps in my throat.

"WHAT!?" I ask.

"It's a spider!" Heather says backing away from the camp fire.

"It's moving." Courtney says hiding behind Gwen.

"I hope it's not the kind that jumps." Gwen says. I see the pun little spider crawling towards the camp fire for warmth.

"You almost gave me a heart attack! The spider isn't hurting anyone. In fact, its venom can't hurt humans." I say.

"I don't care." Courtney says.

"Just squish it!" Heather says. I grab a nearby tree branch and splatter the spider into the grass. What a waste of a life.

"That wasn't necessary. That spider get rid of harmful insects." I say.

"I bet it doesn't get rid of sharks." Scott says.

"Yeah, but it's still creepy looking." Gwen says. And people wonder why I'm so vain. Apparently being 'creepy looking' makes you deserve to die.

"You have no right to talk, Creepy Goth Girl." Courtney says. I don't want Gwen and Courtney to start fighting again or our team will never get to sleep. I wish I could hypnotize them so they go to sleep. I'd probably get in trouble for singing. I need to come up with some kind of distraction. I stare into the stream. There are a few small fish swimming around.

"Hey look at the fish." I say pointing at the water.

"There are so many of them." Gwen says.

"What if there are sharks in there?" Scott asks.

"Who cares about the stupid fish, anyway?" Heather asks.

"Maybe we could catch it and eat it." Owen says sticking his hands into the water. The fish all scatter in different directions.

"They're too fast." I say pretending to try to catch a fish.

"Let the C.I.T handle this." Courtney says. I wonder what a C.I.T stands for. Probably Courtney Is Terrible or something like that. Courtney leans towards the stream. I turn around to see if anyone's looking. They seem to be too busy concentrating on the fish. I push Courtney into the water. I'm slightly disappointed that the gadget didn't shock her.

"Mala suerte! She fell in!" I say pretending to be surprised.

"What did you say, Al?" Owen asks.

"She's going to get eaten!" Scott screams putting his hands over his eyes.

"What a loser." Heather says laughing at Courtney splashing around. Courtney can't get out because the swampy ground is too slippery.

"That wasn't me! I swear." Gwen says.

"She's going to drown. Someone needs to save her." I say.

"I'm not drowning, you idiots!" Courtney sputters.

"I'm not getting my clothes all wet." Heather says.

"I'll help her." Gwen says.

"You were the one who pushed her in. You obviously have it in for her." I lie.

"Don't look at me. I'm not going near the water." Scott says.

"I can't swim and pull her at the same time. Perhaps Owen should rescue her." I say.

"I'll do it! CANNON BALL!" Owen says leaping into the water with a gigantic splash. I was so careful not to get my hair wet while pushing Courtney in. At least I didn't get hurt yet. Owen carries Courtney out of the water.

"Thank goodness. What would we have done if Owen weren't here?" I say trying to be loud enough for Chris to hear.

"Gwen! I can't believe you pushed me in like that. Now I can't sleep because I'm wet. You are so going to get eliminated." Courtney says trembling with rage.

"I didn't push you. You just slipped." Gwen argues.

"Yeah right. I felt you push me. You're just jealous because I'm the better girlfriend." Courtney says.

"You are the new Heather!" Gwen yells storming off.

"I'm right over here. There's no need to replace me." Heather says.

"Wouldn't that make Duncan the new Al?" Owen asks.

"Who am I the new version of?" I ask.

"Probably Justin." Heather says.

"Who's Justin?" Scott asks.

"The useless fan service in the early seasons." Heather replies. Useless? What could a guy do to get some respect around here?

"You'd be the new Izzy because you're such a crazy psychopath." I say.

"I miss Izzy." Owen says yawing.

"Great! Now we're going to lose because Gwen is wandering around!" Courtney snaps.

"She'll come back." Scott says.

"Maybe if you weren't so darn nasty all the time, she wouldn't have ran away!" Heather says accusingly. I laugh quietly to myself.

"Says the pot to the pan." I mutter to myself.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Heather asks.

"Where's Owen?" Scott asks breaking up the argument. I turn around. He was snoring behind me a few seconds ago. His clothes are laying in the grass.

"He's probably sleep walking again." Heather says.

"You'll never take me alive, Jigsaw!" Owen says in between snores from afar. I can't lose Owen. If I do, how am I going to get him in with the Heroic Hamsters? I chase him through the trees until he is out of sight. For someone his size he could run very fast. If I could use my legs I would catch him with no difficulty. Maybe I could get Duncan to help me find him.

I walk quietly through the Heroic Hamster's campsite. "Owen?" I whisper. A tall shadowy figure stops in its tracks. He's much too thin to be Owen. Maybe he's Duncan. I carefully sneak closer to him. It's Mike. Mike hunches over and takes something out of Camren's pocket. He then holds the object over the fire. It looks like an epipen. Camren has life-threatening allergies so if he has an allergic reaction he could die. That would slightly increase my chance of winning the competition. I wouldn't want someone to die over a game though. I shouldn't put my life in danger. It's none of my business, but he stood up for me last night even after I cheated. How would I live with myself if Camren got killed and I did nothing to stop it?

"You should put that back." I say mentally scolding myself for getting involved.

"What are you going to do to stop me?" He asks coming closer to me. He gaze at me and then at the camp fire. I walk backwards and feel the bark of a tree. He picks me up and forces me into a standing position. I feel my knees buckle. I fall flat on my back seeing the moon and the stars. Mike looms over me with an eerie smile on his face.

"Three…Two … One…Re-" Mike jabs my throat with the epipen and cackles like a maniac. He painfully jiggles the needle down deeper into my neck until half the handle hangs out. I try to yell for help but no sound comes out. Whenever I try to speak it feels like I'm swallowing a box of thumbtacks. I cough uncontrollably. Blood begins pouring out of my mouth. I feel the adrenaline from the needle kick in. I grab Mike by the wrists and throw him towards the fire. He tumbles backward letting his elbow touch the flame. Mike gasps. Mike takes his arm out of the fire and yelps.

"I guess I was laying too close to the fire. I hope I didn't break any electronics while I was asleep." Mike says to himself. I better get out of here before his evil personality takes over again, but I have to give Camren back his epipen first. I try to rip out the epipen. I keep holding back when I try to yank it out myself. Heather enjoys hurting me. Maybe I should make her pull it out.

I go to the Vulture's campsite and tap Heather's head. "Heather…" I croak hoarsely. I sound like I ate a million cigarettes. I cough again. "Help." I wheeze.

"Oh my gosh! I thought you were a sumo wrestler." Heather says. I put an over-exaggerated frown on my face. "You haven't found Owen yet? What's taking so long?" She asks. I point at my bleeding neck. She looks concerned for like two seconds. "Well if it isn't the boy who cried wolf. I'm not falling for that again. You're not really hurt." Heather says.

I was *cough* looking for *cough* Owen and-"I hack uncontrollably. I'm glad that the contestants don't have to sing in every episode now. My face turns red and my eyes water. I feel more blood pour out of my mouth and drizzle down my chin.

"Stop talking. You're making it worse." Heather says. "Can you breathe?" She asks. Why is she asking me questions if she doesn't want me to speak? I nod my head up and down.

"You're just like B." Scott says. I don't know who B is. I shrug. I point at Heather and then the epipen. I pretend to pull the air.

"You want me to rip it out?" Heather asks. It's against my best judgment, but I nod anyway. "I don't want to hurt you." She says. Since when does she care about my well-being? When I actually want her to hurt me she backs down. I slam my fists on the ground in frustration.

"What's he saying?" Courtney asks. I ask Heather to pull it out in sign language again with more aggression.

"It's in there too deep. It's even past the pointy part. If I hit your windpipe, you could die." Heather says. I roll my eyes. I see Gwen coming back.

"Where were you?" Courtney asks.

"Talking to my boyfriend, Duncan!" Gwen says somewhat harshly. I point to Gwen, make binoculars out of my hands, and fill my cheeks up with air. I was trying to say; have you seen Owen?

"What are you doing?" Gwen asks. I sigh.

"I'm surrounded by idiots!" I say between coughs.

"Calm down. I'm going to go find Owen." Heather says. I shake my head rapidly. I grab a twig off the ground and begin writing in the dirt. I spell out the word danger.

"I can't read cursive." Scott says.

"I think it spells dagger." Courtney says. I narrow my eyes. I scribble over the first danger and write it again in all capital letters underneath.

"Danger? Where?" Heather asks. I begin to write the word hamsters but the twig snaps.

"Ham?" Scott asks.

"Ham? Where! I want ham!" I hear Owen say from behind us.

"What's so dangerous about ham?" Gwen asks. I put my teeth over my bottom lip. I've never felt more undignified before in my life. I'm getting really tired of all this humiliation. My team laughs in unison.

"The Heroic Hamsters are in danger?" Heather asks. As if on cue, The Heroic Hamsters walk up to us.

"I saw you throw Mike in the fire! Now apologize." Zoey says. I wonder if she happened to see her boyfriend stab me in the throat.

"Make him say he's sorry for breaking Camren's glasses too." Duncan says.

"And for ripping my Cody pictures." Sierra says.

"Did you do any of this?" Heather asks. I shake my head. Well I did throw Mike in the fire.

"You have my epipen. You must have been there when it happened." Camren says. I point at Mike.

"It's not polite to point, Alejandro." Zoey says. I point at Zoey and make an imaginary zipper in front of my mouth. I point at Mike again and make my hands look like claws.

"Mike is evil?" Courtney asks. I nod, and point at the epipen jutting out of my neck.

"Mike would never do something like that." Zoey says.

"He's a liar. He just wants to mess with your relationship." Duncan says. I guess no good deed goes unpunished, but no bad deed goes unpunished either. From now on, I'm going to lay here and do absolutely nothing for anybody.

"I need that epipen." Camren says pulling on it. That's the thanks I get for trying to save his life.

"Get away from him you little termite." Heather says kicking him in the shin.

"We'll settle this in the morning." Scott says looking at the gadget strapped to his arm. He hasn't gotten any sleep yet according to its calculation. I grab Heather by the wrist before she walks away.

"What do you want?" She asks. I break a branch off of a tree and write in the dirt again. I write 'Sierra thought I was Cody and kissed me' with a sad face drawing.

"She's insane. Sucks to be you." Heather says laughing. I wasn't expecting her to react that way. If I were her I'd be jealous. I don't think she realizes how great I am. I write 'You're not jealous?'. "No. Do you want me to be?" She asks. I begin to write the word yes, but then I cross it out and write 'no'. 'Do you really think I look like a sumo wrestler?' I write. "No." She says. I write goodnight in the dirt. "Goodnight." Heather replies.


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, I see Heather standing over me smiling. I check to make sure my legs are still attached. She seems happy for some reason. "I took care of the whole Zoey problem." Heather says handing me Duncan's pocket knife. Please tell me she didn't kill Zoey. She then hands me a large chunk of her red hair. Can't this show go one season without someone losing their hair?

"You cut off her pigtail?!" I shout between coughs.

"It was only one of them. Besides, that'll teach her not to blame you for things you didn't do." Heather the crazy Sour Patch Kid says. She's going to be so mad when she wakes up. I stare at the hair in awe. She has no idea what damage she just caused. Zoey is going to be upset and then Mike will be upset and then he will kill me and then I'll die. I throw the hair at her in frustration. I go into a fit of untranslatable sign language. At one point I couldn't even understand myself. I just wave my arms around, point, and mouth the words I want to say.

"Dude. Chill out! We don't know what you're saying." Scott says. I hold my head in my hands and moan.

"Could you repeat that, Al?" Owen asks.

"Here, write it with the stick." Heather says. I take the stick and bend it with my knee.

"Poor stick." Gwen says.

"I thought Duncan had anger issues." Courtney says.

"Attention campers! Everyone must be on the boat in fifteen minutes for the next part of the challenge. Get a move on!" Chris says in a megaphone.

Our team walks to the beach to get to the boat. I feel someone tap me on the back. I turn around. Mike is standing behind me with an apple in his hands. I fall face first in the sand.

"Good morning, Alejandro. I think we got off on the wrong foot last night. Maybe we should start over. I got this for you while I was climbing a tree. I know you can't climb so I thought you would like this apple." He says handing me the apple. I nod slowly. "I know you like pineapples but I couldn't find any of them." Mike says. Why does everyone think I'm obsessed with pineapples? SpongeBob lives in a pineapple and no one ever judges him. I hear Zoey yelling from afar. I guess she found out about what Heather did to her hair.

"I gotta go. See you later." He says. What's wrong with this apple? I lay it down on a rock and poke it with a stick. It's not explosive. That's a relief. The apple I probably poisonous. He thinks I'm stupid. Little does he know that I have seen Snow White and The Seven Dwarves. I break off a piece of the apple and throw it to a seagull. The seagull eats the apple. It doesn't seem to be poisoned. The seagull waddles through the sand. The seagull lift its wings and squawks. The seagull dives into the water. Fang emerges from a wave and eats the seagull in one bite. I haven't eaten anything in two days. I lick the apple. It doesn't seem to taste suspicious. I take my first bite.

"Fang!" Scott shouts. His delayed reaction makes me drop the apple into the sand. Chef steers the boat towards the docks. He tosses a fishing net at Scott and drags him onto the boat. The other contestants follow. I stare awkwardly at Zoey's asymmetrical hair.

"You're such a bully. Is this the thanks I get for letting you stay the night?" She asks furiously. I shake my head. I point at myself, shake my head no, make my fingers shaped like a pair of scissors, and grab a bunch of my hair.

"I was the one who cut off your pigtail, lame brain. You should be thanking me. Those things make you look like a five year old." Heather says. Obviously Heather doesn't understand the concept of wearing pigtails. Girls wear pigtails to look cute and innocent. When a guy competes against someone in pigtails they let their guard down and get a humiliating defeat. That tends to happen in cartoons like this one.

"You vultures have gone too far this time." Zoey says.

"Maybe this will be a new style." Mike says as he tries to reattach her hair with a roll of duct tape.

"Mike, I don't think that's going to work." Camren says.

"It was so nice of you to try anyway. You're the sweetest person I know. " Zoey says to Mike.

"You two are going to make me barf." Heather says. Mike holds Zoey's hand and walks over to the rest of the hamsters.

"Hey, Al. I saw the weirdest thing last night." Owen says. "I sat on this pointy thing. When I picked it up it was shaped like Chris's face." Owen says. Out of all the people in the game Owen fund the invincibility statue?

"What did you do with it?" Scott asks excitedly.

"I got mad and threw it into the ocean." Owen says. I really wanted that invincibility statue. That would have been really useful for when everyone finds out I could feel my legs. At least now nobody else will be able to find it.

"YOU DID WHAT?" Scott asks.

"I threw it in the ocean. Was it important?" Owen asks.

"Yes! It's the invincibility statue!" Scott shouts. "You have got to be kidding me!" Scott moans throwing himself on the ground.

"Oops! My bad." Owen says.

"Get out of my sight, Owen!" Scott says. Owen lower his head and goes to the other side of the ship.

"I think we should eliminate him instead of Courtney." Scott says. I would eliminate Owen, but I already made that deal with Gwen. I point at myself, link my pinky fingers, point at Gwen, put my thumb down, and point at Courtney.

"You promised Gwen that you'd vote off Courtney without crossing your fingers? You're a terrible backstabber." Heather says.

"Can't we break the promise? I don't mind Courtney that much. Owen's just plain annoying." Scott says.

"We might not even lose this challenge. We'll have more time to think it over later." Heather says. Scott looks slightly relieved.

"What are you three talking about?" Courtney asks. We stare awkwardly at each other.

"Owen." Heather says.

"So you're a C.I.T. That's really impressive." Scott says wiggling his eyebrows.

"Don't smile at me like that." Courtney says putting her nose in the air and walking away.

"Hey, what gives?" Scott asks.

"Don't take it personally. She's probably afraid of being cheated on again." Heather says. Chris blows a whistle.

"Now that I have your attention, I will announce the scores of part one of the challenge. Out of the twelve hours on the island, Gwen got six hours of sleep. Heather got six hours of sleep. Courtney got five hours of sleep. Owen got seven hours of sleep. Alejandro got four hours of sleep. Scott got zero hours of sleep. The Vultures have a total of twenty eight hours of sleep. Mike got seven hours of sleep. Zoey got five and a half hours of sleep. Sierra got eight hours of sleep. Camren got six hours of sleep. Duncan got five hours of sleep. The Hamsters got a total of thirty one and a half hours of sleep." Chris announces.

"How did you manage to get zero hours of sleep?" Heather asks. I am asking myself the same thing in my head. The shark doesn't even show up until the last half hour of the movie. At least I have an excuse for my lack of sleep. Epipens are used as an energy boost to help survive allergic reactions. It makes me jittery. I don't even remember what the movie I saw was about. I didn't have nightmares when I went to sleep.

"The next part of your challenge is to act like your movie villain. I have ten weapons sitting on the table. You will each get a turn to pick a weapon. The person who got the most sleep gets to pick the first weapon. The person with the least amount of sleep will be the last to take their weapon. Scott you get nothing because you didn't get a wink of sleep. The team that scare Chef the most wins." Chris says.

"How is pretending to be a green blob supposed to scare Chef?" Courtney asks. Sierra grabs a pitch fork from the pile. Mike takes the axe Heather had the other night. Owen gets a blow torch. Camren takes a bow and arrow. Gwen takes a whip. Heather takes a golf club. Zoey takes a leech ball gun. Duncan takes a yoyo. Courtney grabs an egg beater. I am left with a stupid trumpet.

I guess all I have to do is pretend to be dead. That doesn't seem to be too hard. I'm actually starting to enjoy this challenge. Watching Duncan singing My Heart Will Go On n a girly voice, Heather trying to wrestle people, and Courtney pretend to be Flubber is pretty funny. When Gwen begins digging her hole, Heather wrestles her into the dirt. I don't like the idea of Mike having a really dangerous weapon in his hands. I'm a little concerned that Camren is trying to fire a bow and arrow without his glasses on. Chef doesn't seem to be very intimidated by my team. I don't really blame him. The most intimidating thing we have on our team is Scott doggy paddling in a kiddy pool humming the Jaws theme song.

Chef walks by the Heroic Hamsters team.

"Your mother eats marshmallows in Camp Wawanaka." Zoey says trying to turn her head all the way around. "Ow! Whiplash!"

"Are you okay, Zoey?" Mike asks.

"Yeah. Just a little sore." She says.

"Grrr. I'm an intern and I like hurting cute little Cody." Sierra says.

"If I shoot the arrow at a forty five degree angle, it will it that tree." Camren says closing one eye and aiming. The arrow misses and hits Duncan' backside. "Sorry, Duncan."

"You're going to get beaten to a pulp for that!" Duncan says breaking character.

"Let me help you with that, Duncan." Gwen says.

"No. I'm going to help him. I want the magic of Cupid's bow to rub off on me." Courtney says. I didn't know Cupid was in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

"He's my boyfriend now. Find your own man." Gwen says.

"You're hurting him. Let me do it." Courtney says shoving Gwen to the ground.

"Settle it with some wrestling." Heather says spreading out her limbs to try to look bigger.

"I don't care who does it. Just get it out!" Duncan says.

"Why don't you two work together?" Zoey say still trying to sound possessed.

"One of you could pull the arrow and the other could pull his arms." Mike suggests. Gwen grabs Duncan's arms and Courtney pulls the arrow because she's the C.I.T. When the arrow comes out Courtney falls backwards in the kiddie pool and Gwen falls forward into Duncan. Duncan howls in pain. Scott swims over still humming the Jaws music. He playfully bites her.

"I'm a shark." Scott says.

"I don't care. Get your scummy mouth off of me." Courtney says wringing the water out of her shirt.

"Check out the cool blow torch I have, Al." Owen says pretending to be dead beside me. "I could do lots of things with it. I could toast hot dogs and marshmallows! Why don't you try to play something on your trumpet?" I hear Mike take in a deep breath of air. "I like hot dogs. Especially with ketchup and a little bit of mustard and cheese and bacon. That's some good stuff." Owen says. I tap his shoulders and zip my lips with an imaginary zipper. Mike raises his axe high over his head and stares at Heather. Her eyes are wide with fear.

"Mike, what are you doing?" Heather asks backing away slowly. She lifts her golf club in the air. He slaps the golf club out of her hand. "Somebody hurry up and do something." She says ducking away from the axe and trying to reach her golf club with her foot. Everyone stops what they're doing and stares. Nobody intervenes because they're not very fond of Heather.

"Mike, stop!" Zoey say. Mike points the axe at her neck. I glare at him.

"You know what they say, Zoey. An eye for an eye and a pigtail for a head." Mike says cackling. I blow the trumpet as a distraction and stand up on my feet for the first time in days. All eyes on me, I slowly stagger over to him ignoring the unbearable pain coursing through my legs within each step. I throw my trumpet at him and slightly pick up the pace.

"He could walk?" Scott asks.

"You still want more?" Mike says turning to me. My fists clench. I crouch down and grab the golf club. "You know that's not going to get you very par."

"Par? I thought he meant far. Oh I get it now!" Owen says. Ignoring Owen's comment, I limp towards Mike. Mike swings the axe at my stomach. Heather screams out my named as I fall to the ground wincing in pain. Blood soaks through my magenta shirt. Mike grabs my arm and twists it behind my back until it's nearly pulled out of the socket.

"Take a good long look at him. I'll let you live for a few extra minutes just so you could watch him die. He tried to save you and what did you do when he was in danger? Nothing." Mike says.

"I'm so sorry." She sniffles wiping the tears out of her eyes. I lay motionless face down in the grass.

"Run." I say coughing out more blood. She doesn't budge. I close my eyes and hold my breath. Mike kicks me in the back rolling me backward into the bloodstained grass. My vision gradually begin to fade. "You made him get burned alive with lava and live in a robot suit for a year and he still tried to save you. You should be ashamed of yourself you worthless little queen bee. Your life is meaningless now that your useless drone is dead. Let me end it for you." Mike says putting his hands around her neck. Heather stands perfectly still almost like she wants him to do it. I rise off of the ground with the axe still half hanging out of my stomach.

"Alejandro?" Heather says.

"What? You're not dead yet? Impossible!" He shouts angrily. I smirk. Mike realizes that he used his only weapon. The 'oh crap' look in his eyes is priceless.

"Three… Two… One… Revenge." I say coughing and licking the blood off my teeth. Mike drops Heather on the ground, gives himself a wedgie, does The Running Man, and sings Take Me out to the Ball Game. Before he could finish the song I whack him on the head with the golf club as hard as I could with my good arm. Mike falls to the ground unconscious.

"Mike?" Zoey says nudging him.

"That was awesome, Al!" Owen says. I try to get over to Heather but I collapse to the ground. "Al?" The Vultures rush to my side followed by the Hamsters.

"Are you going to be okay? If you die, I might go back to jail again." Chris says.

"Chris! Now is not the time." Heather says.

"Heather. I just want you to know that I-"I say choking on my own blood. Why did I ever take my voice for granted? All I ever used it for was to lie and manipulate people.

"Don't talk. You know it hurts." Heather says.

"What's the point? I'm just going to die anyway. I might as well say what's on my min-" I cough uncontrollably. I feel Heather slap me hard across the cheek.

"Shut up! Don't say that. You're not going to die! You can't die! You can't! " Heather sobs shaking me by the shoulders.

"I'm sorry." I say trying to hide the pain in my voice.

"Don't hit him, Heather! You're going to be okay, man." Scott says putting his hand on my shoulder. If there's an afterlife, I don't want to go to heaven. I know Heather will never go there and I really want to spend the afterlife with her when she dies. Nothing could be worse than living at Camp Wawanaka. My family will never see me again. They thought that volcano killed me. I never got the chance to call them and tell them I was okay. My brothers probably don't care. My father's probably disappointed in me for not winning the million dollars last season. My mother is probably a wreck. I wonder if my dog still remembers who I am. I point at myself, make a heart shape with my fingers, and point at Heather. Heather smiles and does the same. I hear Chris's cell phone ring. He ignores it. It gets harder to breathe by the minute. I'm feeling weaker. I can hardly keep my eyes open. I try to say something else in sign language but my arm feels like it's made of bricks. My heart beat slows down. Suddenly all the pain seems to melt away as I drift out of consciousness.


	4. Chapter 4

"It's over…He's dead." Scott says somberly lifting Alejandro's lifeless body off the ground. His blood drizzles down on his white shirt. Alejandro was the only person who understands how it feels to be in a robot suit.

"He can't be. He's the only person who doesn't hate me. I can't make it through another season alone." Heather sniffles. For the first time in her life, Heather regrets the horrible things she did to someone. She has completely forgotten that she is on national television.

"I feel terrible for you. I can't imagine what I would be like if my Cody died. I would be heartbroken." Sierra says remembering all the terrible stuff the interns did to Cody on the movie she watched. Just the morbid thought of Cody dying an awful death makes Sierra shudder.

"Leave me alone." Heather cries pushing her away and runs to the cabin bathroom. She sits on the floor with her head buried in her knees surrounded by the walls of the bathroom stall. The walls are covered in writing in marker from the girls from past seasons. Those messages are just a cruel reminder that nobody will ever like her. Lindsey, Beth, Lashawna, Bridgett, Courtney, Jo, and Gwen all despised Heather for being so mean.

"Rest in peace, amigo." Scott says despondently. Courtney realizes that Scott is similar to Duncan. They're both bad boys with a heart of gold.

"It's okay. He's in a better place." Courtney says putting her hand on Scott's shoulder.

"Better off than the rest of us. Life is short. Let's not waste it away being angry at each other." Gwen says finally agreeing with Courtney.

"Alright as long as you don't push me into the water again." Courtney says shaking her hand.

"Mike is such a jerk." Duncan says slamming his fist against the ground.

"He can't help it. He has a multiple personality disorder." Zoey says.

"Do you think he's dead too? He's not moving at all." Camren asks.

"I hope not. I should have never supplied you crazy teenagers with weapons." Chris says half concerned about the deaths half concerned about going to jail.

"I shouldn't have punched him in the eye." Duncan says trying to hide the guilt he feels inside.

"At least this will make the ratings go up." Chris says trying to look on the bright side.

"We're going to have to dig a six foot hole to bury him in." Camren says.

"We can't bury him with this thing in his neck." Duncan says pulling out the epipen.

"I got an idea!" Owen says.

"Not now, Owen." Scott says feeling emotionally drained.

"I saw this in a movie once. All I need is a giant magnet, rubber gloves, and a rope." Owen says.

"We have a big magnet in the prop closet." Chris says raising an eyebrow.

"I'll get the magnet." Courtney says.

"I'll get the rope." Gwen says.

"I'll find the gloves." Sierra says.

"Meet us at the top of the cliff we jumped off of in episode one." Owen says.

"What happened?" Mike says sitting up and rubbing his head. "Why is my head hurting so badly?"

"Your evil personality took over and killed Alejandro." Zoey says.

"I have an evil personality? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. You need to stay away from me, Zoey. I don't want to hurt you." Mike says getting as far away from everyone else as possible. "If only I my darn head didn't hurt so much." Mike says in Chester's grumpy old man voice. "Chester? You're back! My friends are back."

"Come on, Mike. We got to hurry up and get to the top of the cliff." Owen says.

"What are we doing?" Zoey asks.

"We're going to get the robot out of the water." Owen says.

"Are we going to bury him in it?" Camren asks.

"We're not going to bury him. Get it out of your head, Camren." Owen says.

"Are we going to cremate him? I have a lighter." Duncan says.

Owen stares down the edge of the cliff. Sharks swim around through the tide. "No. We're going to try to bring him back." Owen says.

"I don't think this will work." Chris says.

"We don't have any other options." Mike says.

"We got the stuff." Gwen says as she reaches the top of the hill. Owen grabs the rope and ties it around the magnet. Owen puts the rubber gloves on his hands. He drops the magnet off the cliff and lets it sink in the water.

"Pull." Owen says trying to pull the robot up out of the water. Scott puts Alejandro on the ground and pulls the rope. The rest of the campers join in. The robot slowly rises up out of the water. Once it is on shore, Owen picks up Alejandro and tosses him into the robot. "Clear!" He shouts. Electricity courses through Alejandro's body. Meanwhile…

I find myself floating over a sea of clouds and rainbows. All my wounds are healed. My toenails aren't pink. I feel a warm happy feeling inside even though I know Heather might be in danger. Fighting the happiness is impossible. I need to find a way out of here. I see an angel hover over me.

"Sir, what are you doing?" She asks in a gentle voice. I forgot I don't have to walk on my hands anymore. I really need to get out of that habit.

"I don't think I belong here. I'm not even close to being a good person. I need to go to the underworld so I could be with my girlfriend when she dies." I say.

"Nobody has never been sent here by mistake. You seem to have a little good in you. Besides, you're better off without someone like her." The angel says smiling.

"I'm not supposed to be here. I need to be in the underworld." I say.

"You will learn to accept your destiny." She says. Obviously trying to reason with these angels is pointless. On to plan B.

"I can't help but to notice what gorgeous wings you have." I say.

"Thank you." She says. Great, that completely backfired. Now she probably thinks I'm a nice person for giving her a complement.

"You're welcome." I say.

"Oh dear. You don't have a halo." She say.

"Does that mean I'm going to the underworld?" I ask.

"No. It means your time isn't up yet." The angel says pulling the cloud underneath my feet like a rug. I'm used to falling from Chris throwing me off of the plane two seasons ago. The ground comes closer and closer to me. I brace myself for the landing. The falling sensation stops but I don't feel like I hit the ground. I open my eyes and find myself inside my robot. It was all a dream. I'm safe in my robot and I'm never coming out. I'm not going to take any chances with Heather, Sierra, Duncan, or Mike. My body shakes violently and shivers go up my spine. I fall out of the robot and into the light. My heart leaps in my throat. I look down at my mangled body. This isn't a dream. It's all real.

"It didn't work." Gwen sighs in disappointment.

"We should try some mouth to mouth CTR!" Owen says.

"I think you mean CPR, Owen." Camren says.

"NonononononoNO! I am alive." I scream pushing Owen off me.

"Al! You're alive." Owen says squeezing me like a pimple.

"I thought you were a goner." Scott says.

"We were all so worried." Courtney says.

"Whatever." Duncan says trying to act tough.

"Thank you so much for vanquishing The Malevolent One. He is responsible for the deaths of Mike's parents." Mike says in a squeaky voice and a Russian accent.

"Um, guys. I think I broke Mike." I say raising an eyebrow.  
"You didn't break Mike. You fixed him." Zoey says.

"Why am I not coughing up blood anymore?" I ask. I still hurts to talk so I shouldn't speak unless I really have to.

"Whenever your larynx fills up with air it will expand causing it to rub up against the epipen and make you feel discomfort. Now that the epipen has been removed you should experience less suffering while communicating." Camren says.

"We're glad we could have you bac-" Chris says getting cut off by his cell phone ringing again. "What do you want? I'm trying to host a show here. He did what!? No way! Oh no! That's not good! Well you better hurry up and catch him or we're all doomed! I gotta go. Bye." Chris shouts at the interns.

"What was that all about?" Gwen asks.

"Zombie Ezekiel has escaped the ship on his way off the island." Chris says.

"What should we do?" Courtney asks.

"Get in the cabins. Shut the windows. Lock the doors." Chris says.

"Where's Heather?" I ask.

"She's alone in the girl's bathroom." Sierra says. "I wanted to get a picture of her crying but she made me leave."

"We need to make sure she's okay." I say trying to stand up.

"Don't worry. Duncan and I will take care of it. You just need to rest for now." Scott says carrying me off to the cabin.


	5. Chapter 5

Scott weaves through the trees. The moon is beginning to rise in the night sky. The cabin is only a few feet away.

"Crap! Where's the key?" Duncan asks digging through his pockets.

"One of the hero's must have it since they lost last time." Chris says.

"It was in my backpack when we were in Boney Island, but I don't know what happened to it after my glasses were broken and my epipen got stolen." Camren says.

"Well how are we supposed to get in?" Courtney asks.

"Does anyone have a bobby pin?" Duncan asks.

"I do!" Sierra says. "It keeps my bangs from getting in the way." She says taking it out and giving it to Duncan. Duncan puts the bobby pin in the key hole and jiggles it. A sinister growl could be heard from a distance.

"Owen, was that your stomach?" Gwen says nervously.

"I don't think so." Owen replies.

"Duncan hurry!" Zoey says. The growling becomes louder.

"We don't have much time." Mike says.

"I'm going as fast as I can. Keep your pants on." Duncan says. Footsteps could be heard coming toward us.

"You're so useless!" Courtney says. I wish Heather were here to verbally abuse me.

"We're all gonna die!" Owen says grabbing Duncan by the shoulders and shaking him. The bobby pin snaps into two pieces. The bigger piece is in Duncan's hand and the other is stuck inside the door knob. Way to go, Owen.

"Come on! Open up!" Scot says twisting the doorknob and jiggling it. The doorknob falls on the ground with a clank.

"That didn't just happen. Tell me that didn't just happen." Gwen says.

"It just happened." Chris says.

"Scott! Look out!" Courtney says diving in front of us. Ezekiel jumps out from behind the cabin wall. Everyone screams in unison. Ezekiel pounces on to Courtney and chews on her arm like a dog. That might have been me if she didn't block his path.

"A zombie! I want to take a picture!" Sierra says holding her dilapidated cellphone. "Say cheese!"

"Ouch! Get him off me!" Courtney says waving her arm up and down. Ezekiel clamps his rotting teeth down harder on Courtney's flesh. Scott drops me on the ground. Duncan kicks Ezekiel off of Courtney.

"Get off her, you little creep!" Duncan says chasing him away. Scott helps her up off the ground.

"Are you okay, Courtney?" Zoey asks.

"She got bit! Stay away from her. She will become a zombie too." Chris says.

"What? No! It's only a little scratch." Courtney lies.

"Your arm is covered with teeth marks." Mike says. Our best bet is to kill Courtney before she fully transforms. Although she did try to save us. If she does become a zombie it will increase our chances of being bit. Keeping the rest of us safe is more important than Courtney's life. She was always a jerk, especially to Gwen. That doesn't make me want to kill her though.

"Three… Two… One… Asphyxia." I say. Courtney puts her hands around her neck and strangles herself. She coughs over and over again.

"What's happening to her?" Owen asks.

"She could turn us all into zombies. We have to kill her."I say.

"NO!" Scott and Duncan shout in unison. Courtney's skin gets paler and her eyes begin to water.

"That's not a nice thing to do." Zoey says.

"You're right. It isn't a nice thing to do. It's the right thing to do." I say.

"There's got to be another way." Mike says.

"What if there is no other way?" Gwen asks.

"No one wants to be a zombie, but no one wants to get their hands dirty either. This isn't a game anymore. This is about life and death. If anyone else got bit we have to do the same thing." I say.

"Even if it's Heather?" Scott asks somewhat bitterly. I hesitate for a second.

"I don't care who it is." I say.

"What if we could find a cure?" Camren says.

"Alejandro, stop it! Just give her a little more time." Scott says.

"She was a brat. What's the big deal?" Chris says.

"I love her!" Scott blurts out. Ten seconds of dead silence goes by. He hasn't even known her for a week. I wonder what might have caused that to happen so abruptly. If I let her live and become a zombie I'll be the next one to get bit. The scent of my blood seems to attract the zombies and I won't be able to get away fast enough. If I let her die, everyone will turn on me.

"Three…Two…One… You're back." I say snapping my fingers. Courtney loosens her grip around her neck and gasps for air. "I'll give you more time to find the cure. If she starts to even get a little bit dangerous, we're going to have to kill her." I say.

"We'll start looking for the cure as soon as we can." Camren says.

"I'm sorry that I let my survival instincts get the best of me." I say as Sierra helps Courtney up off the ground.

"Don't worry about it. Courtney's fine. What's done is done. There's no sense of worrying about the past. What we really need to worry about is to find a way to turn her back." Scott says helping me get into the cabin window with the rest of the campers. "I'm going to go find Heather. Try to get some sleep while I'm gone." Scott says.

"I'll kill you if you ever try to do that to Gwen or Courtney again." Duncan says shoving the epipen back into my throat. I try to sit up and swing at him with my good arm. Gwen pulls back Duncan before our battle went any further. I wrap a blanket around my waist to stop the bleeding. Fortunately, my blood type is AB which means I could receive anyone's blood. Chris makes each of the campers donate a small amount of their blood to me so that I won't bleed to death again. Well except for Courtney because she's infected. The door opens. Scott has his hands over Heather's eyes.

"Get your scuzzy hands off my face. I told you I'm not in the mood for surprises!" Heather says trying to push him away.

"This one's special." Scott says.

"It better be for your sake." Heather says halfheartedly. Scott lets go of her eyes. She jumps on top of me. I smile and wince at the same time. "You're still alive after all those things that happened?" She asks half thrilled half astonished. She starts examining the axe mark on my torso. She'd think of any excuse in the book to see me shirtless. "I know what you're thinking. Wipe that stupid smile off your face."

"Heather was so worried." Sierra says.

"Ugh! As if!" Heather says backing away from me and folding her arms. I roll my eyes and hold in laughter.

"You don't need to be in denial." Mike says.

"I am NOT in denial. Who won this round anyway?" Heather says trying to switch the subject.

"Since neither team was able to scare chef, one person from each team will be eliminated and one person from each team will spend the night at Boney Island." Chris says. I don't want to vote off Courtney. If she leaves the island, more people will turn into zombies. I feel bad for trying to kill her after she saved my life. I guess I'll break my promise with Gwen. Owen threw the invincibility statue into the ocean. Maybe I should vote him off. He was the one who brought me back, but I can't stand him. I have no business being here. I'm so badly injured I won't be any help for my team anyway. I'm terrified of half the campers. I know for a fact I won't win the million dollars. I don't even want the money anymore. I just want to go home. Everyone else is going to vote me off for lying about my legs and trying to kill Courtney. I might as well vote myself off like Lindsey. "The hamsters that are safe are Zoey, Duncan, and Mike. The vultures who are safe are Heather, Gwen, Scott, and Courtney. Camren, Sierra, Owen, and I stare at each other awkwardly. "The final marshmallows go to Sierra and Alejandro." Chris says. I'm unprepared to catch the marshmallow so it hits me in the face instead. I smack my forehead. The hamsters voted off Camren? He was the only smart guy. He was the only chance we had to finding the cure. And now he's gone. At least Owen is leaving although I still wish it was me. I don't want to spend another second on this island with these imbeciles.

"See ya later, Al!" Owen says being flushed down the toilet.

"Camren we're so sorry." Zoey says.

"It's okay." Camren says.

"This is nothing personal. Your broken glasses were just getting in the way of things. And you shot me in the butt with an arrow." Duncan says. Camren is about to say something but Chris flushes him before he could speak.

"I'm going to do some more team swapping. Alejandro, you are on the hero's team for saving Heather. Mike, you are now a villain for trying to kill Heather." Chris says. I can't be a hero. Now I'll have to go against Heather. I'll be on the same team as Duncan and Sierra.

"I should be a hero. I tried to save Scott." Courtney says.

"I should be a villain because I cheated on my girlfriend and beat up Alejandro." Duncan says.

"But you saved Courtney." Scott says.

"Owen is a hero." Sierra says.

"Owen isn't in the game." Gwen says.

"Fine! We'll do the merge early. This hero villain stuff is giving me a headache. Just work together to find the cure or something." Chris says. Gracias a Dios! (Thank God!)

"I'm going to Boney Island. I don't want my evil personality to hurt anyone tonight." Mike says.

"Be careful." Zoey says.

"I will." Mike says. I wonder if The Malevolent One is really gone for good.

"I'll go too since I'm the only one on my team to not be in a relationship with someone on my team. I could look for some herbs to try to fix Courtney." Gwen says.

"Good luck." Courtney says. "If they can't turn me back you'll be hearing from my lawyer." She says to Chris. I didn't really expect to make it to the merge. I was prepared to be flushed down the tubes along with the rest of my dignity if I have any left of it to spare. Atleast I don't have to worry about Mike killing me in my sleep tonight.


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning Heather thought it would be funny to put hot sauce in my Lucky Charms. I beg to differ. I rush to the sink and drink water straight from the faucet. Apparently Gwen and Mike just came in when I stuck my head in the sink.

"Uh… Thirsty?" Gwen asks raising an eyebrow. I turn around and nod. I could still feel the burning sensation on my tongue. I put my head in the sink again.

"Cody used to love to eat Lucky Charms." Sierra sighs.

"Any luck finding the cure, Gwen?" Scott asks.

"I picked these berries. I'm not sure if they'll do anything." Gwen says giving them to Courtney. Her skin has turned slightly paler since last night. She has drool dripping down her chin. She eats the berries but doesn't seem to change.

"Do you feel any different?" Duncan asks.

"No." She says.

"Do you think that the confessional will keep Ezeikiel in?" Zoey asks.

"I doubt it. That thing is a piece of junk." Heather says.

"Nobody should go anywhere alone just to be safe." Mike says.

"I agree." Zoey says. Chef clears the empty bowl off the table.

"What if there's nothing on this island that could turn her back?" Gwen asks.

"I don't know." Courtney says.

"Well we got to keep trying." Scott says.

"Maybe the cure is coconut milk." Sierra says.

"I doubt it." Mike says.

"It's worth a shot." Duncan says pouring some into Courtney's mouth.

"Yuck." Courtney says.

"How about tree sap!" Zoey says.

"These are the dumbest ideas I've ever heard." Heather says.

"Do you have any better suggestions?" Duncan asks raising his voice.

"Stop taking advice from all the ditzy girls." Heather says.

"How about salt water?" Sierra asks.

"Let's try it." Duncan says

"Why are you still listening to her?" Heather asks.

"Because I didn't want to take advice from a ditzy girl." Duncan says laughing. Wouldn't Duncan be taking Heather's advice by not taking Heather's advice? I guess his joke wasn't supposed to be taken that literally.

"I am not a ditz. I was referring to little miss lopsided and ." Heather says.

"Stop fighting!" Gwen says. I pull mushrooms out of the ground and hand them to Scott.

"How could we tell if these are poisonous?" Scott asks.

"Cody says no one should ever trust anything Alejandro says." Sierra says. If I hear his name one more time I'm going to scream.

"Cody es un idiota!" I mumble. She takes out her IPhone and looks up what I said in Google Translate. From the looks of it, she didn't have much trouble finding it.

"Cody is not an idiot!" She says through clenched teeth throwing her phone on the ground. "First you throw him to a sharks then you call him an idiot! What did he ever do to you?" She asks grabbing a tree branch and swinging it in the air.

He calls me Al. I gave him candy and protected him from Sierra. He had no reason to call me Al.

"You threw him to the sharks? Not cool!" Scott says.

"It was part of the challenge." Heather says.

"Sierra, put the stick down before someone loses an eye." Zoey says taking the stick from her.

"Hello! Turning into a zombie here." Courtney says.

"Right. Maybe the cure is love." Mike says.

"That sounds kind of cheesy." Duncan says.

"Or maybe it's green jelly." Heather says teasingly.

"If you're not going to help, consider yourself eliminated." Scott says.

"I am the only person here who made it in the final three more than once. You all need me as your leader." Heather says.

"Nobody cares." Duncan says.

"Well you should." Heather says.

"Hey! Guys! Look up there." Mike says pointing up in the air.

"Up where?" Zoey asks.

"Up in the tree. There's a bee hive. Maybe we could get some honey." Mike says.

"Honey could be the antidote." Gwen says.

"Duncan, do you think you could give me a boost. I might be able to get it down." Scott says.

"We're all going to get stung." I say.

"Relax. I got this all under control." Scott says climbing onto Duncan's shoulders. He is able to pull himself up onto the branch with the bees nest on it. He slowly crawls towards the nest.

"Get down from there. You're going to break the branch." Courtney says.

"If you break that branch, you are so dead." Heather says.

"No pressure or anything." Zoey says.

"We could catch the honey in this basket I weaved out of grass." Sierra says putting the basket under the hive. Scott leans forward and reaches for the bees nest. The branch snaps and the bees nest plummets to the ground. Everyone scatters in all different directions leaving me laying there helplessly in the grass. Maybe if I play dead, the bees won't sting me. I lay perfectly still and try not to make a sound. Stingers penetrate into my skin. That's not working. I get up and try to limp away. I feels like I'm walking on hot coal and broken glass. I get down on all fours to try to evenly distribute the pain. Bees crawl down my face.

"You're so slow." Heather says sprinting back and dragging me by the arm. She's going the opposite direction all the other campers are going.

"We're not supposed to go off on our own." I say over the buzzing of the bees.

"Who cares?" Heather asks as she swats at the air. Everyone else was running towards the ocean so they could hide under water. I don't know where Heather is trying to take me but it has to be better than being out here with the bees. She leads me to the girl's bathroom and shuts the door before any of the bees could get in. We both sigh of relief in unison. "We better take out the stingers." Heather says. I examine my swollen face in the mirror and begin plucking out the stingers. On the bright side my black eye looks slightly better. Heather pounds her fist on the bathroom wall in rage. She sits on the floor and clutches her fist which has turned red from the impact. She covers her face with her hands.

"Heather…" I say forgetting how much it hurts to speak. I cough and clear my throat. "Why are you upset?"

"I'm not upset. Who's upset? Not me! You're upset. Now leave me alone." She says. I don't think I could leave because the bees still might be waiting for us outside. I guess I could do the next best thing. I lock myself in a random stall. I wonder how long she wants me to leave her alone for. Oh well. I have to pee anyway from when I drank all of that water after Heather put hot sauce in my Lucky Charms. Trust me when I say it Lucky Charms aren't so 'magically delicious' when your tongue is getting scorched off. Why am I dating her again? I always thought ugly guys were the only ones who pick terrible girlfriends because they are the only ones that they can get. Someone as perfect as me should be with someone like Shakira. Although things would be too peaceful and boring without Heather around. I hear Heather groan angrily from outside the stall after I flush the toilet. Maybe I should check on her now.

"How could you just go to the bathroom at a time like this?" She asks. I shrug as I wash my hands. "You're supposed to be comforting me!" She shouts. I don't understand. She told me to leave her alone. Is this one of those things when girls say one thing and mean the opposite? It would make things a heck of a lot easier if she'd just say what was on her mind. I sit on the floor beside her. "Did you take the time to read the messages on the bathroom stall?" She asks bitterly. I shake my head from side to side. I wasn't in there long enough to take the time to read the vandalism. "Well get in there and read it." She says. I lock myself in the stall again. I read the messages written in marker silently to myself.

'OMG! I hate Heather!'

'Nobody likes her.'

'I agree. She's so annoying. Why is she so worried about getting her hair wet?'

'Maybe she's afraid that she'll melt' I almost burst out laughing. It's funny because it's so true.

'LOL! Bridgett!'

'Ugh! She's such a little snob.'

'She's like the queen of mean.'

'Heather is a nasty slut.'

'She went too far. I can't believe she read Gwen's diary.'

'I hope that Hethur gets voated off.' Somebody needs to teach Lindsay how to spell.

'She should do us all a favor and jump off a cliff.'

'Izzy loves brownies! :)'

'I'm so sick of the crap she puts us through'

'Someone needs to put that spoiled brat in her place.'

'I hope she gets punched in that ugly little face of hers.'

'Heather is nothin' but a stuck up, two timin', spoiled rotten, bald headed string bean.' That must be Lashawna.

'Finally! The witch is gone!'

'Thank god!'

'Good riddance.' In their defense, Heather wrote a lot of rotten things about them too. No one else seemed to agree with her though. I still can't help feeling a little bit sorry for Heather even though she deserves it. Sometimes the vandalism on the boy's bathroom bothers me too. Like the time Duncan spray painted his skull on the bathroom stall. Now every single time I use the bathroom, that stupid skull watches me do my business. I often wonder if I'm the only one who finds it disturbing. I come out of the stall for the second time.

"Did you read it all?" She asks. I nod. I give her some toilet paper to blow her nose with. "Everyone treats me like dirt because they're jealous of me being the best competitor." Heather says. I'm curious to know if it occurred to her that she might be the problem. "I don't understand why I'm so popular yet I have no friends. You're the only one who cares. We'll show them. We made it to the final two together once. We could do it again." She says confidently. There's no way I'm going to end up to the final two. "With my strategy and your talent, we got this competition in the bag." Yeah. Because juggling, playing the accordion, styling hair with my feet, and tying my tongue in a knot is really going to get me far. "What would you do with a million dollars? I'd hire people to cater to my every whim."

"I'd use it to leave Spain so I could come see you all the time." I reply. A loud thump interrupts my happy thought.

"What was that?" She asks. I shrug. The door suddenly breaks down and Ezekiel starts charging at us. With hunger in his eyes he makes a low growling noise. He staggers closer to us knocking the towel rack to the floor. Heather screams in my ear. I lean my back against the corner of the room. I quickly grab the toilet plunger and hit him over the head several times. He rips the sleeve off of my shirt. Before he has time to recover, Heather drags me out of the bathroom.

"That was close. We should go find the others." Heather says. The others were still at the beach. They literally had to force Scott to get in the water so the bees wouldn't sting him.

"Where have you been?" Courtney asks.

"Stupid Alejandro couldn't keep up so we got lost." Heather says.

"Stupid Alejandro just saved your life." I say putting air quotes around stupid Alejandro. My coughing starts up again.

"I had everything perfectly under control." She says. I roll my eyes.

"We think fish oil might be the cure." Mike says.

"We need to find a way to catch a fish." Zoey says. I dunk my head under the water and wiggle my tongue like a worm. Just as I'm about to run out of air, a fish bites and I fling it out of the water.

"Ew." Zoey says.

"What kind of a fish is that?" Duncan asks.

"I don't know but I'm naming it Cody." Sierra says.

"Uh…What's a fox doing in the middle of the beach?" Gwen says pointing at a little fox. It looks like it's foaming from the mouth.

"Stay away from it. It might have rabies." Mike says. The fox's ears perk up. It stares in our direction licking its jowls. The fox darts towards the fish flopping in the sand.

"What's it doing?" Courtney asks backing away from the fox.

"It's stealing our fish!" Heather says.

"Swiper, no swiping! Swiper no swiping! Swiper, no swiping!" Scott yells. I smack my forehead. 'Swiper' proceeds to jump up and bite Scott on the hand. Gwen kicks sand in the fox's eyes making the fox retreat. Apparently when we were fighting the fox, the fish managed to flop itself back into the water.

"Your time is up for the day. Meet me at the campfire for another ceremony." Chris says. For the second time in a row I try to vote off myself. "The following campers are safe; Scott, Zoey, Duncan, Gwen, Mike, and Courtney. This is the final marshmallow. Whoever does not receive a marshmallow must take the Flush of Shame. The final marshmallow goes to…" Chris pauses dramatically. Before he could finish speaking Ezekiel tackles Chris and chomps down on his neck. "I've been bit!" Chris screams. Ezekiel snatches the marshmallow and stuffs it in his mouth. He then disappears into the trees again. Chef carries Chris off to the infirmary.

"What are we going to do?" Zoey asks.

"We'll just count the votes. Who all voted for Sierra?" Heather asks. Mike, Gwen, Heather, and Scott raise their hand. "Who voted for Alejandro?" She asks. Courtney, Sierra, Duncan, and I raise our hands. "You voted for yourself?!" Heather says staring at me in disbelief. I nod hesitantly as I head towards the Flush of Shame. "You can't go! You can't just give up. What's the matter with you? " She says grabbing my leg.

"I've had enough. I want to go home." I sigh.

"It's a tie. What should we do, send them both home?" Mike asks. I shake my head yes and smile.

"That's not important. How is this show going to go on without a host?" Gwen asks.

"I say we each take some of the money and go home." Duncan says.

"How? There's no way off this island." Scott says.

"What about Chris? If we don't do something we'll be zombies forever." Courtney says.

"Hey! Look at that helicopter!" Sierra says pointing at the sky.

"Are they coming to rescue us?" Zoey asks. The helicopter lands on the ground and the doors open.

"Who is that?" Mike asks.

"I'm your new host, Blainley." Blainley says.

"So what are you going to do about the whole tie incident?" Gwen asks.

"A tie breaker challenge. I call it the cinnamon challenge." Blainley says. Sierra gasps. Great. I can't even pronounce the word cinnamon.

"Ugh! Your challenges are so lame. Everyone has tried the cinnamon challenge." Heather says. Apparently it's common for people to challenge each other with cinnamon in this country.

"All you need to do is swallow this spoon of cinnamon." Blainley says. That doesn't sound too difficult. But then again crossing a bridge of legos didn't sound difficult either. I'm not fond of sweet food. I used to swallow swords before I got this epipen lodged in my throat. Sierra puts the spoon in her mouth. I do the same to the other spoon. I take my time so Sierra could get a head start. I feel my mouth drying up. Sierra wheezes out a dark brown cloud.

"I think I might have forgotten something." Blainley says.

"Water." Sierra whimpers.

"That's it." She says. I try to swallow the soggy wad of cinnamon in my mouth. It tickles my throat. I choke as cinnamon spews out of my mouth. "Since neither of you were able to eat the cinnamon, you both will get flushed.

"YES!" I cheer smiling like The Cheshire Cat. Finally I can go home. I won't have to worry about my injuries or death. I could go back to being a spoiled rotten mama's boy again.

"What?" Blainley asks. Her eyebrows furrow.

"Two double eliminations in a row?" Courtney asks. Sierra and I get inside the massive toilet. I cling on to the edge unable to tread water for very long.

"I'm glad you're happy. You just lost the million and your girlfriend. You said you'd be there for me." Heather says coldly.

"Any last words?" Blainley asks holding the handle.

"I'm sorry." I say.

"I'm coming, Cody!" Sierra shrieks as she flushes us down. I feel my ribs slam against the pipes. My necklace gets snagged onto something enabling me to go any further. I refuse to die from being flushed down a toilet. I jerk my head back snapping the chain. Behind the dark see of bubbles I see a light up ahead.


	7. Chapter 7

I crawl towards the light. The water slides me down through some kind of a secret entrance. It's a large room with a couch below a giant television. There are seats full of people staring at me. Some of them I've met before, some of them I haven't. "Where are we?" I moan.

"We're at The Total Drama Aftermath Studio. It's where all the eliminated contestants go. Including Cody." Sierra replies excitedly. A short girl with glasses helps us up off the ground.

"Hi! My name's Beth!" She says with a lisp.

"From Total Drama seasons one and two!" Sierra says. Beth was on Total Drama? I thought you had to be like sixteen to get in that show. She looks like she's about eleven. Sierra gives Beth her autograph book to sign.

"Yep. That's me. I'm sorry you didn't win and you got dumped. Heather made me so mad when I was on the show with her." Beth says. The whole being dumped thing hasn't really sunk in yet. Probably because she was just as mean to me as she was when we were together. I've never been dumped before. I dumped lots of girls back in my day. Now I understand why they were so sad. I feel terrible and Heather wasn't even a good girlfriend. I'm like a gold mine. I can't even imagine how unhappy they were. I guess the best thing I could do is not think about her. It's pretty hard not to when I look down at my mangled legs.

"What do we do to sign up?" Sierra asks.

"Just talk to Geoff and he'll give you an interview." Beth replies.

"Who's Geoff?" I ask.

"He's that guy in the pink jacket and the cowboy hat. I'm going to get his autograph." Sierra says.

"Hey, Sierra! Nice to have you on the show." Geoff says.

"Can I have your autograph?" She asks.

"Sure. Bridget, can I borrow your pen?" Geoff asks.

"No problem." Bridget says giving him the pen. He signs the book and sends Sierra into another room. "Well. Well. Well. Look what the cat dragged in." Bridget says glaring at me.

"Why haven't I seen you here before?" He asks with a stern tone. He sounded so laid back when he talked to Sierra.

"I've never been voted off before." I say.

"What makes you so special?" Geoff asks scornfully. What makes me so special? I was stuck in a robot suit for an entire year and still stayed tan. Who am I kidding? I'm a piece of crap. I've been dumped and flushed down a toilet.

"Just lucky I guess." I say coughing a little. One of the interns guide me to the same room as Sierra. She is sitting in front of a television watching what's going on in the room I just came out of.

"There's Cody! Right over there! See him? See him? See him?" She says pressing her finger on Cody's face on the screen. I nod. She leaves behind a smeared fingerprint on the screen.

"Hey everybody! I'm Geoff." Geoff says through the tv.

"And I'm Bridget." Bridget says.

"And you're watching Total Drama Aftermath." Geoff says.

"We will be starting this episode by interviewing our new guest. She raised a baby condor, married Cody, and blew up an airplane." Bridget says.

"Put your hands together for Sierra!" Geoff says. Sierra skips merrily out of the room.

"Some of our contestants are going to ask Sierra a question. If she lies she'll be hit over the head with a big mallet." Geoff says pointing up at the massive mallet attached to a lie detector. She is strapped to a chair by two interns.

"Not that again. That's so dangerous and barbaric." Bridget says.

"Who wants to ask the first question?" Geoff asks.

"I do. If you had to date anyone other than Cody who would it be?" Lindsay says.

"Cody, of course!" Sierra says. Noah slams his palm onto his face.

"She said OTHER than Cody." Tyler says.

"Chris or maybe Camren." Sierra replies.

"How did you make it through so many episodes without Cody?" Harold asks.

"I kept one of his dirty socks. Whenever I get lonely I sniff it." She says.

"What was your most embarrassing moment on Total Drama?" Izzy asks.  
"Probably when I blew up the plane." She says.

"How long do you spend on your fan page?" Tyler asks.

"Sometimes days at a time." She says.

"That's what I call dedication. Now let's move on to our next guest. He's been dying to be interviewed." Geoff says. Bridget clears her throat.

"Where is he?" She asks.

"Al can't walk." Owen says.

"Well then bring him in." Geoff says. Owen drags me onto the stage by my feet. "I bet this truth or mallet is getting boring to our viewers. Let's try something new. If he lies I will drop a grand piano on his legs." Geoff says.

"Don't you have anything heavier to drop on him?" Bridget asks.

"We could put Owen on the piano." Geoff says watching me get strapped face down onto a table. If I lie I won't even see the piano fall.

"Why do you hate being called Al so much?" Geoff asks being smothered by Sierra.

"Don't be ridiculous. Al loves being called Al." Owen says.

"Where I come from having a short name means you're not manly." I reply clearing my throat.

"Out of all the people you manipulated who was your favorite?" Cody asks.

"Lashawna. She punched Heather's tooth out." I say.

"How does it feel to have your heart broken for a change?" Lashawna asks.

"I feel kind of lousy but I know I could do better." I say coughing.

"Serves you right." Lashawna says.

"How did you put up with her for so long?" Beth asks.

"I kiss her to keep her quiet." I say.

"How does it feel to get beat by Heather twice?" Bridget asks.

"Not as bad as losing to her three times." I say with a smirk on my face. Bridget's face turns red.

"Are you embarrassed that you chickened out of the competition?" Geoff asks.

"Yeah. But it could be worse. I could be wearing a stupid cowboy hat." I say.

"Are pineapples your favorite fruit?" Lindsay asks.

"No. Cantaloupe is." I say.

"How did you survive in the robot suit for a year?" Izzy ask.

"Feeding tubes." I reply.

"He's not lying. I guess that means you get a reward." Geoff says putting a giant plate of pancakes in front of me.

"PANCAKES!?"I scream fuming with rage.

"Yes, pancakes. You have to eat them. If you stop eating the pancakes our special guest will smack your butt with a paddle." Geoff says. Jose walks out from behind the curtain with a paddle tightly in his fist.

"How's it goin' little Al? I haven't seen you in a while." Jose asks scornfully.

"Go away." I mutter taking a bite of the pancakes.

"Before we start the mini challenge let's show a little clip." Bridget says. The screen shows

Heather painting my toe nail and tormenting me to no end. Jose and the others seemed to get a charge out of it especially when she said she was going to chop off my legs and I went into a crying fit. As much as I can't stand Heather I miss her voice.

"Aw. Is Al afwaid of a little girl?" Jose asks as I eat. "Chew faster." He says whacking my rump with the paddle. I yelp and continue to eat. The people in the crowd laugh sadistically. I must be the most hated person on the show. I hope I never have to eat another pancake as long as I live. I put my hand over my belly and pray to god it's not soft and jiggly. I feel the sticky syrup on my beard. I try to swallow a large amount at once to get it out of the way. The epipen blocks it from going down my throat. I gag. Jose strikes me again making me choke and vomit all over myself. The smell of it in my hair makes me even sicker. I can't stand the taste anymore. Jose hits me with the paddle four more times.

"That's enough already. You're killing him." Bridget says.

"I thought you didn't care about him." Geoff says.

"I don't." She says getting defensive. The lie detector lights up. The piano comes crashing down on Jose's arm and my legs. We scream in unison. I hear my legs crunch under the impact. Now my legs probably will have to be amputated. I'm in so much pain that I think I might pass out at any second. That's when I decide that if the world wants me to suffer, I want the world to suffer as well.


	8. Chapter 8

"Get it off!" Jose screams.

"Lightning, Jo, Eva, Tyler, Brick, DJ pick up the piano." Bridget says. They struggle to lift the piano off of the ground. Jose gets out from underneath the piano on his own.

"I don't think I could hold it much longer." DJ says nearly dropping the piano on me again. I cringe.

"Owen! Get your butt off the piano!" Jo shouts.

"Whoops. Sorry, Al." Owen says getting off the piano. They move the piano away from me and set it down. "I mean Aleha- Alo- Alu- Alie- Al." Owen says.

"I don't care if you call me Al." I sigh.

"That's what you get for kissing my girlfriend, Al." Geoff says. THAT'S what this is about?

"That was over a year ago! Who cares what I did to Brittany?" I yell.

"It's Bridget." Bridget says sounding slightly annoyed. I'm so delirious I don't know who anyone is anymore.

"I can't move my arm!" Jose screams as he is carried off by a stretcher. Well at least he got what he deserved. I lay quietly on the ground planning my vengeance.

"Alejandro?" Beth says rolling an empty wheelchair towards me.

"What? Did you come here to laugh at me some more?" I ask bitterly.

"I was laughing with you, not at you." Beth says grinning. "I got to show you something." She says pushing me in the wheelchair towards Camren.

"My friend, B and I are constructing you a better robot suit. We're going to put in a new translator so you don't have to strain yourself when you speak. It's the least I could do for accusing you of stealing my glasses and epipen. It should be ready soon." Camren says. That's one of the nicest things anyone has done for me in a long time. He's off of the list of people I'm going to make miserable. I know for a fact that I want to make Heather unhappy. The best way to do that is to make her jealous. I could get with someone else and wait for Heather to want me back. I stare at the past contestants. Maybe I could get one of those girls that are wearing the same outfit. They've been gawking at me for quite some time now.

I scoot over to them in my wheel chair. "Are you two related?" I ask. They look at each other and giggle.

"We're best friends." The tall tan girl says.

"But we're like sisters." The paler one says.

"The way Geoff treated you was so uncool." The tan girl says.

"You think so too?" The paler one says.

"Yeah totally." The other one says.

"My name is Katie." Katie says.

"And I'm Sadie." Sadie says.

"That's a nice name." I say.

"Thanks." They both say in unison.

"He was talking to me!" Sadie says.

"No! He was totally talking to me!" Katie says.

"Was not." Sadie says.

"Was too!" Katie says. Sadie tackles Katie to the ground and punches her in the nose. Katie pulls one of her pigtails. I guess I have to pick one now. I'm not entirely sure which one is which. I hope they don't kill eachother.

"Get off her, Katie!" I say.

"I'm Katie!" The girl on the bottom with the nose bleed says.

"Why fight over him if you could have me." Some guy who is shockingly better looking than me says physically separating the brawling girls. Well he's going to ruin my plan. I guess I don't really mind because they were getting on my nerves.

"One of you should date my brother and the other one could date that guy over there and we should pretend this conversation ever happened." I say.

"I call Justin!" Katie says. I guess that's enough torture for Jose for now.

"I see you're finally starting to understand shipping." Sierra says sitting on Cody's lap.

"Would you quit talking about shipping?" I ask.

"The AleHeather shippers on my fan page are upset because you and Heather broke up. They think you two should get back together." Sierra says. My fans could jump off a building for all I care. Why is it any of their business what I do anyway? They're not the boss of me. From now on I'm never going to do what I'm supposed to again. On to plan B. I see a pretty blonde girl sitting by herself reading a book. Heather would probably be jealous of her. I approach her. Before I could say anything she closes her book and stares at me dead in the eyes.

"I sense some darkness in your aura. You should try to fix that." She says backing away from me. She's on to me. I guess that means Creepy Lady is out of the question. Maybe I could try talking to the lady sitting next to her. Her body is spray painted orange and wreaks of hair spray.

"Excuse me. What kind of spray tan do you use?" She asks.

"The sun?" I say with a puzzled facial expression. She runs her fingers through her hair and pulls out a can of hair spray. She sprays half the bottle onto her hair. I feel my eyes burning. I try to tell her to stop but I go into one of my coughing fits again. I push my wheel chair as far away as possible. Plan C was a complete dud. A bald woman in a pink sweater comes up to me.

"My great uncle George invented chimneys. Before chimneys were invented every time someone lit their fire place the house would fill up with smoke." She says.

"Fascinating." I say.

"My grampa Ronald invented shoe laces. If it weren't for him everyone's shoes would fall off." She says. "And my cousin Barbra invented tissues. Before tissues were around everyone picked their noses."

"We all know those things aren't true, Staci." The lady with the spray tan says. I need to learn to be less picky. Sam I dating a twenty foot tall mutant and he seems happy.

"How do you know, Anne Marie? You weren't around back then." Staci says. I leave before things get too heated. Jo and Eva are in some kind of a push up contest. They both seem strong since they're able to lift a piano. If I dump one of them for Heather they'll beat me to a pulp. I'm running out of options and letters of the alphabet.

"Your arm strength is incredible." I say. Jo thanks me but Jo doesn't seem to hear me. My wheel Chair hits a bum on the floor. I hear a cracking noise. I back up to see what it is. The Ipod I ran over is completely destroyed. "Sorry." I say.

"My Ipod!" Eva shouts. "You're going to get it!" She growls through clenched teeth. She kicks my wheelchair in the air. I hold on tightly to the arm rests. The wheelchair slams into the wall and tips to the side.

"Eva! Take deep breaths." DJ says. Brick holds Eva down.

"Trent! Quick play some music! It's the only way she'll relax." Noah says throwing a guitar to Trent.

"Uh_Eva don't be mad

I want you to be glad

Come out of your angry spell

Please don't throw that dumbbell" Trent sings playing an improvised guitar song. Eva stops thrashing away from brick.

"What happened?" Beth asks turning the wheel chair upward again.

"I broke Eva's Ipod while trying to make Heather jealous." I say.

"Maybe I could help." She says.

"Forget it. It's hopeless." I say.

"You're right. She'd never buy it. I'm not really your type." Beth says pouting. "But I'd love to put Heather in her place." She sounds so angry and serious but her lisp doesn't sound intimidating at all. I can't help but to smile.

"Maybe we could pull it off. She hates you so that would make her angrier if she saw us together." I say.

"Maybe Lindsay could give me a makeover." Beth says with a peppy grin on her face. Lindsay is going to have a lot of work cut out for her.

"I'd love to!" Lindsay says.

"What should we do first?" She asks.

"First you should put on clothes that match." I say.

"Green and pink don't go together?" She asks.

"No. They don't." I say.

"Try this on." Lindsay says handing her a plain orange dress with a brown belt from the costume room. She locks herself in the costume room and puts on the dress.

"Do I look silly?" She asks opening the door a tiny bit.

"No." Lindsay says.

"But you can't wear dress like that with sneakers." I say.

"You're right." Lindsay says grabbing a pair of brown sandals. Beth takes off her sneakers and puts on the sandals.

"Is this better?" She asks.

"Yes. Much better." I say.

"Maybe she should lose the glasses." Lindsay says taking her glasses off.

"Lindsay! I can't see." Beth says stumbling around. She nearly falls over but I catch her with my stronger arm. My elbow digs into my thigh. I wince.

"Keep her glasses on for now. Perhaps we should give her shoes that doesn't have a heel on it." I say.

"I'll get the hang of it." Beth says. Lindsay takes out Beth's hair tie letting her hair down. She runs a comb through it.

"Do you mind if I take off some of these split ends?" Lindsay asks.

"Not at all. I'll do whatever it takes to make Heather learn her lesson." Beth says. Lindsay finishes fixing Beth's hair. Then Lindsay buffs her fingernails to make them look shinier.

"We should tweeze your eyebrows." Lindsay says.

"No. She looks fine the way she is right now." I say.

"I don't want to be the ugly duckling anymore. I want to be a swan." Beth says. The way she said sthwan was kind of cute. It would be really nice to have a girlfriend I'm not terrified of.

"Tweezing hurts." I say.

"It's not that bad." Lindsay says.

"I could handle it… I guess." Beth says nervously.

"Are you sure you want to go through with this?" I ask.

"Positive." Beth says. Lindsay takes the tweezers and plucks out the first hair.

"Ow!" Beth whispers.

"Sorry." Lindsay says. "I'll try to do it quicker. It will be like ripping off a band aid." Lindsay says. Beth squirms in the chair.

"Stop." I say covering my eyes.

"She'll be all lopsided." Lindsay says.

"It doesn't matter." I say.

"Don't you want to make Heather jealous?" Lindsay asks.

"Yes. But I don't want Beth to be uncomfortable doing it." I say.

"It's okay. Keep going." Beth says. "This is for all the people Heather put down."

"Tell her a story. It'll keep her mind off the pain." Lindsay says.

"This one time my dog, Chica went missing in a thunderstorm. I went all over the neighborhood for her and hung posters on every telephone poll. No matter how hard I looked, I couldn't find her. A few hours later I gave up and went home. I was soaked from head to toe from the rain. There were no messages on the answering machine saying they found her. Here, the entire time, she was hiding under my bed from the thunder." I say trying to drag out the story as much as I could.

"You're all done." Lindsay says.

"I am?" She asks.

"Yeah. All you need is a little mascara." Lindsay says. "There. You look so pretty now."

"That wasn't so bad." Beth says giving Lindsay a high five.

"You're quite the trooper, Beth." I say.

"Thanks." She says.

"You're welcome. Now get out there and show everyone how you look." I say. Beth comes out of the costume room and gets complemented almost instantly. I don't think I've seen someone so happy before.

"Wow, Beth! You went up from like a two to an eight." DJ says.

"Beth? Is that really you?" Bridgette asks.

"Yep." Beth says.

"You go girl!" Lashawna says.

"There's something different about you. Lightning can't put his finger on it. Don't tell me. Don't tell me. Sha-Bingo! You got your braces off." Lightning says.

"I got my braces off like two years ago." Beth says.

"What I think Lightning means to say is you look awesome." Jo says.

"I feel like a princess." Beth says. "Here. Have a friendship bracelet." Beth says putting it on my wrist.

"Thank you." I say examining it.

"You're welcome. Now let's see how the robot is doing." Beth says.

"We're almost done. B's just running a few tests. I believe you'll be much more comfortable in your new robot. There's a way to get out of the robot to use the bathroom. It even has a cannon just in case you get into a fight." Camren says.

"While you're waiting for them to finish I'll put some ice from the cooler on your legs." Beth says.

"Don't you think Geoff would get angry if I used his ice?" I ask. The last time a girl put ice on my legs I got frost bite.

"No. Geoff doesn't like ice. Especially hail. He is terrified of that stuff." Beth replies. That gives me an idea. "You know I haven't had a boyfriend in like two years. I used to be with a guy named Bradey. We met over the internet. I never sent him any pictures of me. He wanted to see me the day I made it to the finals. After he saw me and found out I didn't win the money, I didn't hear from him again. I guess that means I was never in a real relationship before." Beth says.

"Looks like you're in one now." I say putting my arm around her.


	9. Chapter 9

The best part about being on the Aftermath Show is that you get to watch the Total Drama All-stars episodes instead of putting my life in danger being in the show. Now that I'm in my new robot, there's nothing to be afraid of. The show seems to be going downhill now that Chris I gone. Their challenge was to do The Cup Song until everyone messes up except for the winner. I didn't manage to stay awake through the whole thing. The sound of a toilet flushing rings through my ears.

"Our new guest is here." Bridgette says. I hear the sound of a toilet flushing. Heather comes out of the pipes.

"Ugh. Chris is so disgusting." Heather complains wringing the water out of her hair. "We need to talk." Heather says coming closer to me.

"I'm listening." I say. (Well type into the translator. The robot does the talking for me.)

"I mean we need to talk alone. Oh and take off that stupid robot suit. Its voice is so annoying." Heather says. Her bossiness is almost intolerable sometimes.

"I knew you wouldn't last long without me." I say pressing the eject button. The robot's door opens up making a ramp for my wheelchair to roll down.

"Whatever. Isn't there somewhere private where we could talk?" She asks.

"I don't think my girlfriend would like that." I say.

"I see you're back to your old ways again. Treating everyone like they're disposable. Who's the unlucky person this time?" She asks.

"I am." Beth says.

"You're dating Beth?! Why on earth would you date Beth?" Heather asks.

"What's wrong with Beth?" I ask.

"She's an ugly little geek." Heather say. Beth stares at her reflection through the side of my robot and frowns.

"But… I changed." Beth says.

"You have the body of an oompa loompa. No matter how nice you dress you will never be beautiful. Ever!" Heather says. Beth loses more and more of her confidence by the second. Her bottom lip quivers. "And don't even get me started on that ugly little nose, and that disgusting birthmark on your neck, and your slobbery retainer, or that annoying voice, and that irritating little lisp of yours." Heather says pointing out all of her flaws. Then she wonders why everyone write hateful things about her on the bathroom stall. Beth cover's her birthmark with her hand. Her face turn red. My hands ball tightly into fists. Beth sniffles quietly. With tear trickling down her face she runs out of the room.

"Well that got rid of her." Heather says coming down to my level.

"WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?!" I ask as I slap Heather across the face. My eyes widen. I put my hand over my mouth. Oh crap! I hit a girl! I didn't mean to. I don't know what came over me. I was just so angry. If my mother saw me do that she'd be so upset. I feel so ashamed of myself. I broke the gentleman code. No I didn't break it. I terminated the gentleman code. I'm not even sorry. She deserved it. But I wasn't brought up to hit people.

"I got bit." Heather says putting her hand on her cheek. A red mark starts to form there. My heart skips a beat. She got bit? It'll only be a matter of days until she will become a zombie as well. The thought of it terrifies me. We stare at each other silently for a moment. To me it feels like an eternity. I see the fear in her eyes like the time Mal tried to kill her. I mentally scold myself for caring. Well at least she'll be as ugly on the outside as she is on the inside. Although at times I could be just as shallow as she was. Ever since I've been with Beth I've been more open minded and less selfish.

"So what? This is not my problem. You dumped me. I'm not your boyfriend anymore." I say. My voice sounds hoarse from the yelling.

"I didn't mean what I said at the elimination ceremony. I was just angry because you quit instead of trying to make it to the final two with me." Heather says.

"Don't you even think about biting Beth." I say narrowing my eyes.

"Give it a rest. I know that this whole Beth thing is just some pathetic little attempt to try to make me jealous and want you back." Heather says.

"Pathetic? The plan worked. Didn't it?" I ask.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever. Can you just dump her already?" Heather asks.

"No. No I won't. Wanna know why? I love Beth because she helped me and she made me a bracelet. You tried to cut off my legs and put hot sauce in my cereal." I say.

"Your plan to manipulate Beth might have worked but two could play at that game. I'm always one step ahead of you. How about a taste of your own medicine." Heather says.

"Nobody else can put up with you." I say.

"Justin. You're my new boyfriend now. Deal with it." Heather says. I probably should have saw that coming. Justin is probably the only person on this show who is better looking than me.

"But I'm with Ka-" Justin says.

"Shut up!" Heather says using intimidation to get her way. "I bet you're really jealous now."

"Yep. Now Justin is dating the girl who is going to be a zombie in three days. I am filled with envy." I say sarcastically.

"I can't believe Heather would want to date me after all of my deformities from season two." Justin says.

"Deformities? You had a black eye." Heather says.

"I'm still disfigured from that terrible incident." Justin says.

"Where? You look fine." I say.

"No I'm not. I've been mutilated beyond recognition." Justin says. Showing two different photographs of him. "Can't you see the difference?" He asks.

"In the first picture the sky is sunny and the other one the sky is cloudy." I reply.

"My face used to look like it was carved by angels before I got my black eye." Delusional Justin says.

"Do you want to see deformed? I have a black eye that is still somewhat visible. And I have one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven… ELEVEN bee stings to the face. God forbid you get a serious injury like a papercut." I say.

"I'm still more deformed than you." He says childishly. This is the dumbest argument I've ever had in my life. Clearly everything I said went through one ear and out the other.

"Um. Hello! You two are supposed to be like fighting over me. Remember?" Heather asks. I ignore her. I show Justin my badly stitched up axe wound on my stomach where my six pack is supposed to be and my mutilated legs. He looks away in disgust.

"I'm  
still a freak." Justin says.

"You're full of it." I say realizing the only deformity I have left is the paddle mark on my butt.

"I'm freakishly handsome." Justin says smiling from ear to ear. To think I almost felt sorry for that arrogant pig.

"I'm going to see if Beth's alright." I say getting back in my robot suit.

"I don't see why you're so mad at me for what I said to her. I was just stating a fact." Heather says.

"How would you like it if all your life you were insecure and one day you were happy with yourself and didn't have to worry about what other people think then some jack wagon humiliated you?" I ask. I tell Sam to use the remote control to move my robot to the other room. Beth sit in the corner of the room with her face buried in her arms.

"Who are you calling a jack wagon, you overgrown toaster oven?" Heather asks.

"Don't let that scrawny lowlife snob get to ya girl." Lashawna says patting her on the back. "And if I were you, I wouldn't trust Alejandro." I guess Lashawna didn't realize I was standing about ten feet away. " I go past Lashawna and go straight over to Beth. Lashawna smiles sheepishly. She really needs to keep her big mouth shut.

"Beauty is only temporary. When you get older the only thing that matters is how kind you are to others." I say. I wonder why I never take my own advice. I'm a genius.

"Does my new look make me seem like I'm pretending to be someone I'm not?" Beth sobs.

"I don't think so. You don't need to wear it if you don't want to. I kind of like your wacky mismatched colors. It suits you. I like all of your quirks. I think they're cute." I say.

"Do you really think so?" Beth asks. I nod. Beth take off my robot helmet and kisses me. Her retainer scratches my lip but I don't really care at this point.

"Stop! What are you doing?" The creepy blonde lady says dropping her book on the ground.

"Kissing my boyfriend." Beth says embracing my cold metal robot suit.

"You look familiar. Do I know you?" I ask. I hope she's not one of my ex girlfriends I lost track of. That always makes things awkward.

"I'm Dawn. You're about to make a huge mistake. Alejandro was going to betray you to get back with Heather." Dawn says. Beth gasps.

"I trusted you." Beth whispers angrily.

"But I changed my mind. That was before we were friends." I say.

"Yes. That's where you made your mistake." Dawn says.

"What do you mean?" Beth asks.

"You died trying to save her from The Malevolent One. You were going to risk leaving heaven and going to the underworld just so you could be with Heather." Dawn says.

"How do you know about that?" I ask. Dawn starts glowing yellow all around her. White feathered wing spread out of her shirt and a halo appears above her head.

"Wow! I want wings!" Beth says.

"It's you!" I say.

"She must have meant a lot to you if you were so loyal and committed." Dawn says.

"I was stupid back then. I used to not be able to imagine what life would be like without her. Now that I'm with Beth, I don't miss her at all." I say.

"I know you don't mean that. Nobody makes the ultimate sacrifice for someone and then stops caring about them all together." Dawn says. She is so wrong. I don't miss when Heather used to belittle me, or torture me, or the way she held me when I thought she was going to hack off my legs. Okay I miss the last part a little.

"This is none of your business. You know Heather's going to be a zombie in like three days right?" I ask.

"Not if I can help it." Dawn says.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"I am The Moon Child. I am able to raise the Blue Harvest Moon every fifty years. If a zombie is kissed by a human under the Blue Harvest Moon they will turn back to normal. But you will only have one night to turn the rest of the zombies back." Dawn says.

"So you could turn everyone back?" Beth asks.

"Rising the Blue Harvest Moon puts me in in a meditative state and takes a great amount of power. Sometimes I can't even hold it for the entire night." Dawn says.

"But if a zombie doesn't get kissed they will be a zombie for fifty years." Beth says.

"Wait. You've risen The Blue Harvest Moon before? You're a teenager. How is that possible?" I ask.

"I am actually seven thousand eight hundred and twenty nine years old." Dawn says.

"And they still call you the moon child?" I ask.

"Yes. Because I died when I was seventeen years old. An angel doesn't age after they die." Dawn says.

"What are you doing on earth?" Beth asks.

"I was sent down here to restore the environment by removing the toxic waste that Chris put on the island. The toxic waste was harming the animals and their habitat. But it is still my duty to control the afterlife and the undead." Dawn says.

"You're really making thing complicated." I say.

"It's simple really. All you have to do is turn the zombies and get back with Heather." Dawn says.

"I'll help turn everyone back but get the Heather thing out of your head. It's not going to happen." I say.

"Heather isn't as bad as you think she is. Let's take a look at the past." Dawn says putting her finger on my forehead then Beth's. A beam of light blasts into my vision. I squint. Dawn, Beth, and I are back on the island. I step in a puddle of blood. I look down at my own corpse with the axe jutting out of it. Mike is unconscious beside me. Heather shakes my dead body and weeps.

"It's over…He's dead." Scott says soberly as he lifts my body off the ground.

"He can't be. He's the only person who doesn't hate me. I can't make it through another season alone." Heather sniffles. Sierra tries to comfort Heather.

"I feel terrible for you. I can't imagine what I would be like if my Cody died. I would be heartbroken." Sierra says making everything even worse. Heather tells Sierra to leave her alone and runs off.

"Heather! I'm alive." I yell to her.

"She can't see or hear us." Dawn says.

"Where's she going?" Beth asks.

"We're about to find out." Dawn says following Heather. Before I leave I hear Scott say "Rest in peace, amigo." I stop dead in my tracks. Why am I getting all choked up? I know I'm alive.

"This way." Beth says pulling me forward by the robot's arm. Dawn brings us inside the girl's bathroom. Heather washes my blood off of her hands. She stares at herself in the mirror. She smears off her mascara with a paper towel. She can no longer stand to look at herself. Heather sits in the vandalized stall crying her heart that I thought she never had out. Beth join in with the crying.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"I wrote that nobody like Heather on the stall. I'm like a bully." Beth says.

"We can't dwell upon the past. It has already happened. All you can do is try to make it up to them in the future." Dawn says. Heather digs through her purse. She takes out a pen and paper. She write a long note as she cries. Her eyes are red and puffy. She takes out a package of shavers. She takes off the plastic safety cover. She swallows a lump in her throat and points the blade at her wrist. I hold my breath to stop myself from screaming.

"Heather! Don't do it!" Beth screams covering her eyes. I try to snatch the razor by my hand goes through her like a ghost. She hesitates.

"Come on you big sissy." Heather says to herself between sobs.

I let out a sigh of relief. Heather tries again this time letting the blade touch her wrist. Just before Heather tries to slash her vein Scott open the stall.

"Heather! We have a surprise for yo- What are you doing?" He asks.

"Nothing." Heather lies dropping the note on the floor.

"Come on. You gotta see this awesome surprise." Scott says smiling.

"I'm not in the mood." Heather says. Scott drags Heather out of the bathroom, rips up the note, and flushes it down the toilet with the shaver. Why wouldn't Scott tell me about something that important? Dawn takes us back into the present.

"Alejandro. I'm sorry. I can't do this to Heather. I just can't. You're all she has. I can't take that away after what I wrote about her. I don't want to tear you two apart." Beth says.

"Does that mean you're breaking up with me?" I ask.

"I guess. We can still be friends right?" Beth says. Neither of us have a clue what's going on. That's like the second time I got dumped this week.

"Of course we can." I say.

"Would you like to see how your future would have looked like if I didn't intervene?" Dawn asks.

"Sure." I say. Dawn puts her hands on our foreheads again. The me from the future is sitting around minding my own business. The Heather of the future climbs on top of the future me. Because my legs are still broken I can't get away. She kisses me just as future Beth enters the room. Then of course she blamed me for it and Beth chews me out.

"That's what Heather did to Trent in season one! Gwen was so upset." Beth says. Dawn sends us back into the present again.

"See. Now aren't you glad I didn't mind my own business?" Dawn asks.

"Yes. That would have been really bad. Thank you, Dawn." Beth says.

"You're welcome." Dawn says sitting down and reading her book.

"Heather is probably in the studio being interviewed." Beth says. Sam uses the remote control to move the robot back into the studio. Heather is strapped to an electric chair that's hooked up to a lie detector. At first the contestants were asking her questions about how it felt to have her head shaved and stuff like that. They must have had the voltage up pretty high because she gave mostly honest answers. Occasionally someone in the crowd lies to give Heather a shock. I open up the cooler and crush all of the ice. I put the chunks of ice into my cannon and shoot it at Geoff. Geoff throws himself off of the couch and screams in terror.

"Hail! Help! Make it stop! I'll do whatever you want." Geoff begs.

"First apologize." I say.

"Alright. Fine. I'm sorry, man." Geoff says. I stop shooting the ice. I put the rest back in the cooler before it melts.

"Now unstrap Heather." I say. Geoff removes the straps from the electric chair. Heather gets up out of the chair.  
"What's going on? Why are you helping me?" Heather asks.

"I know how to cure everyone. I'll only tell you what the cure is if you apologize to Beth." I say.

"I'm sorry for calling you ugly, Beth." Heather says.

"I'm sorry I wrote all that stuff on the bathroom stall. Please don't kill yourself." Beth says.

"I'm not going to- How did you know about that? Scott wasn't supposed to tell anyone. That idiot!" Heather says sounding a bit flustered.

"He didn't tell me anything. I found out on my own." I say.

"So how am I going to turn back?" Heather asks.

"According to Dawn, you need to be kissed a human under the Blue Harvest Moon." Beth says.

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." Heather says.

"The Blue Harvest Moon will rise tonight. It won't rise again for another fifty years. We need to go back to the island to tell the others." I say.

"You're full of more bologna than usual." Heather says.

"I know this all sounds crazy but if you kiss Justin tonight you'll stay human." I say.

"But I don't want to kiss Justin. He's annoying and he always fishes for compliments." Heather complains.

"Even more annoying than me?" I asked feeling slightly amused.

"Possibly." Heather says. "This whole dating Justin to make you jealous thing totally backfired." Heather says.

"You don't need to be jealous of me anymore. Alejandro and I are just friends now." Beth says.

"I knew he would dump you." Heather says.

"Actually Beth dumped me because she didn't want to make you upset." I say.

"Are you trying to put me in a guilt trip? If so it's not going to work on me." Heather says.

"I just wanted to make it up to you for making you sad." Beth says.

"Thank you, Beth." Heather says.

"Does this mean you two are going to get back together?" Beth asks excitedly. Way to rush into things, Beth.

"I don't know. If she wants to I guess. I have no clue what's happening anymore." I say trying not to sound too desperate.

"Well you didn't dump him for nothing." Heather says.

"But what about Justin?" I ask.

"Justin, I'm not your girlfriend anymore. Get over it." Heather says turning to Justin in the crowd.

"FREEDOM!" Justin cheers getting up out of his seat and doing a happy dance.

"Shut up! You're giving me a headache." Heather snaps. Justin sits back in his chair quietly.

"How are we going to catch all of the zombies?" Beth asks.

"We're going to need an army." I say trying to see which contestants would be the most useful.


End file.
